Title: Who Gets the Girl? [Chapter 32]
Players: Everyone. OT9.
Pairing(s): Mentions of Hyosun, TaeNy, Taengsic, Yoonyul, Yoonsic, Random kissing and Straight!Sooyoung lol
Rating: PG-13 + some language
Genre: AU, Rom-Com Drama-Llama.
Warning(s): I pulverize ships, apparently.
Disclaimer: I don't own Soshi. I don't own anyone, in fact. All Fiction.
Chap. Summary: Sooyoung tries her own brand of friendly intervention.
Author's Notes: I edited this rough draft while tipsy. TIPSY EDITING OT9 FOR Y’ALL. Love you. <3
Ask any average person about their favorite and they’d proudly list a video game or console or toy.
Sooyoung’s favorite game was people.
What else was there to do for a bartender with a social services background, natural intuition, and friendly smile? It helped to be pretty; people always divulged more to attractive women. She discovered herself on the receiving end of the most revealing, heinous, sex-fueled, and sometimes illegal confessions by patrons under the influence.
No, she didn’t wield voodoo power over her enemies or trap strangers in a house for a real-life The Sims experience, but she did play out scenarios in her head. A lot. Usually happy endings. She imagined the Japanese guy who blacked out in Korea to safely find a way home. The pitcher-finishing newlywed made an amazing impression on her in-laws. The businessman who lost to a younger colleague eventually found a profession more fulfilling than corporate. Sure, she never knew the true outcomes of said people, but she hoped for the best constantly. ‘Twas her nature to do so.
Sooyoung took a breather once her feet hit the “go away” mat before Sunny’s door. A casual morning run turned into a “Emergency Lesbian Alert? I’m on it.” detour. Her heart raced, ready for some semblance of dramatic entertainment. The last two weeks of back-to-status-quo living was killing her, especially since Yoona wasn’t the blubbering type to need constant consoling.
My dear Yoona. You take on so many burdens without complaint. I’ll help fix this because these girls are a wreck. Call me politically incorrect, but lesbians should be having more fun, damnit!
She didn’t need to view the apartment number included in the address Hyoyeon sent; the discordant jumble of female voices rattling from the room did all the work.
The door flew open as she lifted a fist into knocking position.
Hyoyeon grabbed at her wrist. “Took you long enough. Get in here.”
The taller girl stayed in place. “I brought company.” She tugged the leash for her 70-lb Siberian Husky to hop up from his sitting position.
“Hercules! There’s my favorite boy!”
“He’s my running buddy. You didn’t give me time to drop him off.”
“No matter. He’s welcome.”
Sooyoung smiled. Hyo inviting me over to Sunny’s home? This is interesting already.
Sunny’s quaint living quarters reminded her of college days. Alcohol containers everywhere. Non-matching furniture. Old and new books crammed together in dusty stacks. Cluttered yet comfy. The mass of people inhabiting the space, however, had the opposite effect on Hercules.
The white and gray animal spun around, bushy tail wagging frantically. “Ever the attention whore, this one.” Sooyoung laughed, making him heel for Sunny to pet him on the nose.
“Omigossssh. What a cute doggyyy!” Tiffany squealed, putting the excited dog back into a frenzy. She and Yuri giggled at this and headed over to join the fun. Sooyoung didn’t fail to notice Yuri instantly retract her hand from a girl she could only assume was Seohyun. Seohyun hovered near the commotion, detecting their level of awkwardness.
Sooyoung scanned her up and down. So, this is the seductress, huh? She looks harmless enough on the outside. The most dangerous kind.
Jessica and Tiffany’s girlfriend, however, remained in their respective seats. Jessica waved her way, resting her sweating cup onto very inflamed knees. Taeyeon sat stiffly on a rise of textbooks, petrified. Widened eyes were the only parts moving as she watched Hercules bound on his hind legs.
Tiffany raised her voice. “Taeeeyyy, baby. Come see the doggy!”
“Um, I’m okay over here,” Taeyeon mumbled, eyeline averted.
Ah, right. Her name’s Taeyeon. Slipped my mind. “Give 'em some love, Taey. He doesn’t bite.”
“Taeyeon’s afraid of dogs,” Jessica interjected, nonchalantly swiping at her phone’s screen.
Tiffany’s jaw dropped. “Babe, you own a snake. How are you afraid of doggies?”
“Snakes are calm, intelligent creatures. That beast..” Taeyeon's cheeks puffed, making her appear way younger than her true age, “is NOT a doggy. It’s a direwolf. And I’m no Stark.”
Jessica rolled her eyes. “You’re not an intelligent creature.”
“And you’re heartless.”
“Why’s that? Because I was going to let you stupidly stick a screwdriver into a plugged-in speaker?”
“You didn’t even protest it.”
“That’s your fault. Let natural selection take its course.”
“Ignore them, Herc,” Hyoyeon cooed, ruffling soft fur. “Leave the lovebirds in their own bitchy nest.”
Obviously, she meant it as a joke, but Sooyoung caught something.
A heated glance between the two.
For a split second.
What was that? Sooyoung handed the leash to Sunny, taking in her new-found discovery. She edged closer to Tiffany, attempting to casually acquire information.
“Jessica seems angry.”
“She does?” Tiffany’s innocent eyes met hers--not a bit of sarcasm.
“Does she and Taeyeon always have such...animosity?”
She giggled, flashing a grin at them. “Yeah, they’re always at it. That’s how their friendship works.”
“Jessi’s snippy with me, too. I guess it’s whatever works for everybody! Like--” She pointed to the crowd around the dog. “Sunny and I are new friends, so we’re really sweet to one another. Sunny and Taeyeon love making jokes at each others’ expense since they’re closer. Same with Sunny and Jess.”
“Oh, so they’re normally hostile.”
“Not hostile. More like...comfortable?”
They exchanged a grin.
Tiffany’s head dipped down, conceding. “Okay. They’re a little hostile.”
This Tiffany girl’s more observant that she’s given credit. She knows things about Jessica and her unpredictable friends that’ll let me know if Yoona avoided more trouble than necessary. We haven’t talked to most of these ladies since the day we packed Yuri’s things.
She nodded to the unoccupied kitchen area. The dark-haired girl, intrigued, followed her over.
“Do you like games, Tiffany?” Sooyoung asked, retrieving a phone from her waistband.
“Yes...what are you up to? You have a naughty glint in your eye.”
Sooyoung began tapping at her touchpad. “You’ll see.”
These women will get nothing done without a little nudge.
An unexpected knock at the door brought the buzzing room to silence.
“Expecting anyone?” Hyoyeon mumbled to Sunny, detangling from their cuddling on the bed.
Sunny shook her head, eyes narrowing.
Sooyoung smiled. Hyo being cuddly and casual with a girlfriend is refreshing. Now I’m no longer required to scope out random chicks for her ‘Hot or Not’ verbal ratings. She tapped Tiffany’s arm. “You should get the door. You’re closest.”
Finally, the ball could get rolling. Tiffany had begun to divulge a few bits of juicy information, ultimately interrupted by a hovering Yuri, trying hard to squeeze into the conversation. Sooyoung and Yuri never formed a true friendship over the course of the relationship with Yoona. Therefore, the efforts to get in good with the taller girl felt a little forced.
“Check the peephole first,” Hyoyeon ordered, acting like the head of the household. That’s so cute. As if they live together already.
“It’s...” Tiffany paused, blinking a few times. “A Latin model?”
“Really!?” Hyoyeon and Taeyeon squawked at the same time.
The duo paused to air high-five like long-lost perv siblings.
Oh, here we go. That’s a match made in hell.
“A male Latin model,” Tiffany clarified, glaring.
“Let him in. It’s just Gabe.”
The tall, equally lanky (and pretty) male revealed behind the opened door looked like a martian amongst the eight women.
“Good day, ladies!” Sooyoung’s boyfriend greeted, bowing.
“W-what is that?!” Hyoyeon asked her girlfriend, faux disgusted.
Sunny wrinkled her eyebrows, playing along. “I believe it’s the animal they refer to as man.”
“A strange creature. Where are its boobs?”
“Real funny, Hyo.” Gabriel laughed, winking at Sooyoung. “I’m not staying. Just here to make a special deliv--uh oh. Hold up.” They listened to his receding footsteps as he ran out the door.
A voiceless scuffle echoed from the hallway.
He returned, with a kicking woman strewn across his arms. “Special delivery!”
“Oh, hell no!" Hyoyeon spat, getting to her feet. "This is an anti-Yoona household!”
Sooyoung scoffed, ignoring the outburst. “Thank you, dear.”
Yoona stopped her squirming and crossed her arms petulantly. “Your boyfriend kidnapped me!”
Omigosh. She’s so gay and awkward in close contact with men. I would have paid money to see how he managed to get her into the car.
“Care to trade?” Gabriel nodded at Hercules who’d begun to dance in a frenzy once he saw his other owner.
“Don't downgrade! Keep the dog!” Hyoyeon yelled, garnering a sneaky laugh from Seohyun.
Taeyeon stood up from her makeshift book seat. “No! Take the girl!”
“Damnit, Taeyeon. Thought you were on my side!”
Sooyoung held the leash out to Gabriel while Yoona wrestled from his grasp. The kidnapping victim lingered silently as the room broke into a squabble. Sooyoung could have sworn she heard “mozzarella sticks” mentioned in the fray.
“You did well, Gabe. Now, get out of here,” Sooyoung teased, shoving at his shoulder.
“I have a question first.”
“No, it can wait. How about you--”
“Which one of you is Jessica?” His deep voice sliced through the air of girly bickering like a testerone-laden knife.
A few moments passed.
“Uh...me.” Jessica answered, eyeing him suspiciously. She’s been noticeably silent since Yoona showed her face.
“I see. Pleased to meet you, Jessica.” He did a very gentlemanly bow before turning around to shoot Sooyoung a nod of approval. “Nice, hon.”
God, I shouldn’t have ever told him about that kiss. She managed to push him out into the hall. “You’ve overstayed your welcome.”
“Alright. I’m out. I’ll be walking Herc around the block until you’re finished here.”
Wish I didn’t have an afternoon shift. Guess I’ll be mixing drinks in exercise gear all evening. “Cool. Leave.”
“Listen, ladies. We don’t have much time,” Sooyoung declared to the group, clasping her hands together. “Tiffany and I think you need an intervention.”
Jessica scoffed. “Tiffany’s making that call? That’s rich.”
“Soooo,” Tiffany continued, holding out Taeyeon’s hat. “We prepared a game for you!”
A collective groan swept through the room.
“Are we doing icebreakers? What are we, twelve?”
“To be honest, I’d mistake you for a twelve-year-old, Taeyeon,” Sooyoung quipped, pointing a bony finger. “Tiffany’s passing out a slip of paper to each of you. On it, write one action that would make things better between two fighting people.”
“Oh, that’s easy.” Hyoyeon said with a grin, scribbling on her piece.
“One action that’s not sexual.”
Tiffany nodded. “Something like, 'Name a good quality about the other person.'”
“Geez. I wasn’t aware my girlfriend’s so corny,” Taeyeon grumbled, folding her piece to stick into the hat.
Sooyoung claimed another hat, a bright purple fitted of Sunny’s, and stirred its contents. “It may seem silly now, but it’s been weeks and the only people who’ve made obvious progress are Sunny and Hyo.”
“Yoona, don’t you want to sit down?” Tiffany whined, taking her paper.
“I feel like I’m not particularly wanted here.”
“Yeah, you are!” Yuri chirped, hopping from the desk stool where she’d relocated after Sooyoung’s showed up. “Take my seat. I’ll sit next to Taeyeon.”
Awwww. How courteous of her. Yoona, still pouting, sighed and landed in the spot. Jessica stirred in her chair, obviously restless. I wonder what’s going on between those two. Yoona's been maddeningly quiet about that. “We’re gonna have fun, girl! Remember fun?”
Yoona rested an elbow on the desktop. “Hardly.”
“You’re nothing but sunshine today. This is for your own good.”
"Thank you, Straight Savior."
Sooyoung peered around the room. Yuri and Taeyeon on the books, Hyo and Sunny sitting on the bed. Jessica in the biggest chair. Seohyun on the beanbag and Yoona at the desk. The proximity with the Yuri’s side piece may cause trouble. “Tiffany, draw the first names, please.”
Tiffany grinned and pulled a slip from the purple hat.
*Round One: Yuri vs. Jessica*
Sooyoung’s kept a neutral face as she read the messily-written action from Taeyeon’s hat:
Make out/Scissor!!! Trolololol!!!
She cleared her throat. “Oh, this is a good one. In one sentence, say how you really feel about each other.”
Hyoyeon sneered, obviously expecting a more salacious request. “Who the fuck wrote that?”
“I did. Yuri, you first.”
Yuri tapped her chin, contemplating her words.
C’mon, Yuri. We don’t have all day. Sooyoung drummed the imaginary watch on her wrist. “We have a thirty second thinking period.”
“Thank god.” Jessica sighed, eyes trained on her phone.
“Um, okay. So...” Yuri started. She paused, glancing around the room, before returning her gaze at the blonde. “Jessica, I think you’re evil.”
Hyoyeon, Sunny and Taeyeon didn’t hide their amusement as they burst out laughing.
Jessica didn’t look up from her screen. “Yuri, I think you’re a fucking idiot.”
The laughter grew louder. Those three shorties are sure getting a kick out of this. One of you may not be smiling soon. “An A for honesty. So next we can--”
“I’m not done!” Yuri snapped, hand raised. “Jessica, I’m not kidding. You’re not a good person. You’re manipulative and crabby. At least I’m nice! You’re not even kind to the people that mean the most to you. You’re a bitch.”
“That’s not true.”
Yuri raggedly slid her hands into her dark hair, possibly on the verge of tears. “Nobody here can deny it ‘cause it’s all true! You’re a bitch devil incarnate and it's no wonder that you're so damn miserable.”
Jessica sat up, blazing red face making her knees seem almost normal. “I know I’m a bitch, bitch. However, you know nothing about me and my stupid friends. I love those idiots with all my heart.”
“Yay?” Tiffany squeaked, not knowing whether to speak.
“I may not be goofy cheery like you, but I’m truthful. I say how I feel. And you’re wrong. There’s one person in this room that’ll always get my good side. Always.”
Goddamn. I wish that was recorded. Sooyoung side-glanced at Yoona. Her friend watched the entire exchange with an unreadable expression. Yuri or Jessica, buddy? Or neither..
The silence that followed gave Tiffany cue to read the next slip.
*Round Two: Yuri vs. Yoona*
“Yoona, Yoona, Yoona.” Hyoyeon mockingly sang, bobbing her head back and forth. “You see why I’m anti-Yoona? She’s the hub of all our woes.”
“I barely know most of you!” Yoona retorted.
Yeesh. I should have included a Yoona vs. Hyo slip.
“I’ll read it!” Tiffany unfolded a paper. “If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? Yoona?”
“I can answer this!” Yuri blurted. “Un-unless you wanted to go before me.”
Looks like somebody gained a burst of energy after yelling at Jessica.
Yuri bounced her leg nervously as she spoke. “S-self control. I...I don’t have a lot of it. I used to wonder why you kept such a tight hold on me. Then, I realized that once I get my freedom, I mess up.”
Seohyun’s creepily calm face had Sooyoung eyeing the establishment for any sharp object in case the girl went ballistic.
“I mean...I needed to get all this pent up...whatever out of my system. I did it the wrong way. I’m sorry, Yoona.”
What are these feelings? Pity for Yuri? Arrgggh.
Yoona's comfortably warm smile took Sooyoung by surprise. “Thank you, Yuri. As for me, I wish that I wasn’t so determined to make everything perfect. I should have taken more chances and relaxed.”
“I still love you.”
The entire room held its breath, heads slightly turning to one another, waiting for the next words.
Seohyun snatched Jessica’s melted margarita from the floor and downed it in one go. “Next,” she uttered, crushing the cup in her fist with an audible crunch.
*Round Three: Yoona vs. Jessica*
“Let me read the next one,” Hyoyeon said, holding out her hand for Tiffany to bring the hat. “‘Cause I’m ninety percent sure you bitches are stuffing the actions with lame self-help shit.”
Hyoyeon took a single look at the slip and slapped a hand over her smile.
Please don’t be another scissoring request.
“I believe this is for you,” Hyoyeon snickered, passing the paper to the right. Sunny joined the low laughter.
Taeyeon snorted out a laugh. Yuri shook her head and smiled before giving it to Sooyoung.
Sooyoung took in their reactions another few seconds before reading the sheet. On it was a very crude, very hairy drawn penis with the words: To: Sooyoung--Love, Yoona ♥ .Tiffany craned her neck for a good view and began giggling derpily, too.
“Ohmygahhhh. Why are you all so immature!?”
Yoona, picking up on what just occurred, smirked. “I thought after being in here with us for so long, you’d get lonely.”
Sooyoung pinched her relieved smile into a pout as she threw the balled-up paper at her friend. Glad you’re having fun at my heterosexual expense, you douche.
Hyoyeon fished another folded piece out, still grinning. “Damnit, Yoona. Cut it out or I’ll start to not hate you.”
Yoona crossed her legs, stealing peeks at the snake tank. “And we wouldn’t want that.”
Jessica, only obvious to a watching Sooyoung, licked her lips and leaned forward. “So, what’s it say, Hyoyeon?”
Sunny snatched the slip before it went sailing to the trash. “Say something nice about one another.”
Taeyeon pounded her knee in pervy defeat. “Shit, where’d our make out slips go, Hyo!?”
“No idea, man.”
“This is easy,” Jessica hummed, resting a chin on her fist. A smile!
Yoona gave Jessica eye contact for the first time that day.
“Yoona, you’re always on my mind. Even when I try to busy myself with other thoughts or--I’ll be honest--other girls, it doesn’t work. Having you treat me like any common pleb at our job sucks worse than if you didn’t speak to me at all. You make the best company. I really...”
Half the room leaned in, following her trailed-off words.
“I really um,” She batted her eyelashes at the other faces, smile falling. “I really like you and I miss you.”
Oh god, my heart.
Ever the friend, Sunny handed Seohyun another drink.
With nosy precision, the heads redirected to Yoona. Yoona with the pretty face of stone. You’ve turned the act of freezing people into an artform. “Your response, Yoona?”
Out pooched her top lip. Then she bit it, holding back what Sooyoung could only believe was a huge, crooked grin. “Jessica, you--”
The popping crunch of Seohyun’s second cup cut her sentence short. Sooyoung openly frowned her way.
Yoona continued, the smile more apparent. “Jessica...you’re a very...amicable coworker...and...”
No, no. Don’t play formal associate. Sooyoung’s eyes zeroed in on Yoona’s mouth that still hung open.
“...a great kisser.”
Jessica’s smile stretched out so wide that she quickly shielded it with her hand, gazing downward. “So are you.”
“Awwwwwwwwww!” Sooyoung squealed along with Tiffany, hugging in girly swooning. Better than the dramas! So much better!
She hadn’t even noticed Yuri in the kitchen until she clacked an emptied cup onto the counter. “Next!”
*Round four: Taeyeon vs. Jessica*
“What?!” Taeyeon hiccuped, eyebrows high on her forehead.
Tiffany nodded. “It’s good for you two. There’s tension.”
“You gotta be kidding me.” Jessica crossed her arms.
Hyoyeon held out the hat. “Get a good one”
Taeyeon snatched a slip, cursing under her breath once she read the lettering.
“What’s it say?” Hyoyeon prodded, trying to read over her shoulder.
“Ugh...it says to kiss. Fuck that.”
Now, it was Sooyoung’s turn to crack up. “Gotta do what the paper tells you, Taey.”
“Babyyyyyy,” Taeyeon whined, giving her girlfriend the most revolting of pouty faces, “I don’t wanna kiss Jessica. Don’t make me.”
Tiffany walked over, presumably to coddle her little girlfriend. Instead, she patted her on the head, collected the hat and replied, “Do it. It may be good for both of you.”
“Really?” Jessica brandished a huge eye roll. “So much for being the jealous type.”
That was not the right thing to say. “Jess! Are you hinting that I get jealous?! It’s just a kiss between friends. God. Here, watch.”
She bent over and pulled Sunny by the neck, pressing two soft kisses against her lips.
Hyoyeon looked on the verge of combustion. “LAWD JEZUZ. Kiss her back! Kiss her back!”
Tiffany released Sunny who already had a bright pink blush across her cheeks. “See? Friendly kisses.”
“She sh-shouldn’t have to kiss Jeshka if she doesn’t wanna,” Seohyun muttered through slurred lips.
Taeyeon pointed in her friend's direction. “Drunk Seohyun is right. I’m not doing it.”
“Damnit, you two.” Hyoyeon kicked at Taeyeon’s book stack, sending her falling to the floor. She nabbed her by the waist and dragged her over to the comfy chair. “Damn, girl. You’re hella weak.”
“Let me go!”
“We can do this the easy way or the hard way. Choice is yours.”
“Jessica sucks souls with that mouth! Don't send me into the abyss!”
“Hard way it is.”
Taeyeon went flying onto Jessica’s lap. Jessica screamed from the blunt landing atop her sunburnt knees.
They’re...aggressive. Didn’t think the game would go this direction. She checked her bestie’s expression, only to be shocked by Yoona clapping with laughter and cheering it on.
Having fun are we, my mood-swingish friend?
“Fine. I’ll do it!” Jessica brought a hand to Taeyeon’s face, squished her cheeks into fishy-lips, and planted a wet kiss. “Now, get off my lap; you’re killing me!”
“Ahh, hell!” Hyoyeon griped, tapping at her phone. “My camera didn’t come on fast enough. Do it again?”
*Final Round: Yoona vs. Seohyun*
“Hot damn!” Hyoyeon danced around in a circle. “This is what I’ve been waiting for the whole time. What a great idea, Sooyoung!”
Why does Hyo’s pleasure in this game make me worried?
“Do the honors?" Tiffany held the hat out to Seohyun.
The girl, slouched deeply into the bean bag, stretched her eyes to read the handwriting. “Make...out.”
Taeyeon, with renewed energy, leapt from her seat to double-five with Hyoyeon. “Finally! My body is so ready!”
“Don’t get too excited, babe,” Tiffany mumbled under her breath, sliding the red hat back onto her head.
Yuri floated over, holding a hand out. “You guys, maybe this isn’t such a--”
“Move, bitch!” Hyoyeon shouldered her friend out the way as she and Taeyeon lifted Drunk Seohyun from the bag. “Kissing makes all the pain go away. Doesn’t it, Taeyeon?”
“Ah, yes. I feel like a brand new woman.”
“Right there on the lips, Juhyun.”
“You’re okay. Right, Seohyun?”
“Only if it makes dis end sooner.” Seohyun stumbled towards the desk. Yoona recoiled at the closeness.
“Yoona~yaaaahhhh,” Hyoyeon crooned taking a hold of Seohyun’s face like Jessica did Taeyeon, tilting her towards Yoona.
My 'impulsive bestie' senses are tingling. “Yuri’s right. Maybe we should choose a better action.”
“No, no.” Yoona bit her lip, eyes sparkling. “I don’t mind.”
“Dude, you’re even cooler than I thought!” Hyoyeon pressed Seohyun’s lips into a pucker. “How can you stay mad at a face like this? Let’s kissy-kissy and make out to make up. Got your camera ready, Taeyeon?”
Taeyeon grinned and held the phone up. “Yep, compadre.”
Seriously. A match made in the most hellish of hells.
Yoona closed her eyes. “Bring her here.”
Everyone besides the two making kissy noises held their breaths. Is this really gonna happen? Im Yoona turning the other cheek to Seohyun of all people?
Their lips barely touched before Yoona snapped her head back and bound forward, bashing her head into Seohyun’s and sending the room into a tizzy. The drunken one threw her fists a few unsuccessful times as she fell back into a spazzing Hyoyeon.
“Hoooooohhhhh sheeeeeeet! Taeyeon, you get that!?!”
Taeyeon dropped the phone and ran to her groaning friend. “Baby Juhyun, speak to me!”
“Ughhh. This...this is why I don’ drink.”
Sooyoung snapped out of her paralyzed state when Yoona stood up, pointing a finger at the figure lying on the floor. “Game over, bitch. Don’t ever come near me--drunk or sober.”
She made a b-line to the door. “We’re leaving. Gabe should be waiting by now.”
Sooyoung, mouth agape, nodded and waved to the room. Everybody was too focused on an impromptu argument about Youtube ethics to wave back.
“Yoona, can I come with you?” Yuri asked, hands in a pleading position.
“Of course you can.”
And out they went.
Okay. No more real life people games.
Next Chapter: Yoona!
Thank you, O heavenly Straight Savior. For the lulz.
((Cred to pic source.))