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09 January 2016 @ 12:02 am
Greener Grass [06]  

Title: Greener Grass [Part Six]

Pairing(s): YoonSic

Rating/Genre: R; AU Healing Romance

Warning(s): There be lesbians in this fic.

Disclaimer: I don't own Soshi. I don't own anyone, in fact. All Fiction.

Author's Notes: As mentioned elsewhere, this chapter was a dragon to slay. ;___; I changed a ton and…*nods*. It should make more sense. It’s not the most edited of chapters, but it’s eager to be let out the drafts folder. And I’ll listen to what my story says.

Also: I’m replying to your comments on Part Five! Don’t be discouraged to say a thing or two. I’m not ignoring anyone. ;((

Part Six:


“Where were you?”

Yoona kicked off her canvas sneakers. They’d been no match for the storm, soaking to her skin.

“Where were you?” Chanhwi repeated, merely a silhouette in the bedroom entrance. “I’ve been calling everyone.”

She knotted her ankle socks into a wet ball. “Phone was on silent. Sorry.”

“Thank god you’re all right.”

“I need a shower.”

“Hold on.” In a beat, Chanhwi materialized before her. Beer on his breath, handsome eyes sallow. “Where were you, Yoona? Quit avoiding me.”

Yoona couldn’t pass the weight in her throat. Her insides cramped, begged for her to stream the lies from her naked body. “I’m not.”

“I know you. I know your eyes,” he murmured, lifting her chin with a single finger. “Something happened.”


“You scare me, Yoona. I’m not your terrible father; it’s me, Chan.”

“Hello, Chan.”

He grinned and moved to scratch his upper lip. “I drank too much.”

She’d offer to take him to bed, to distract with sex or foreplay. Any means to get him asleep.

But, she hurt too much.

“I was out with a friend,” Yoona croaked. “Hours danced by and...yeah.”

“Guy or girl?”



They stalled, voiceless. A grandfather clock dotted the silence in metal ticks and tocks. Yoona buried cold fists into her hoody pockets, hating the monotonous melody.

“When you wait up all night for someone, you know it’s love.”

Yoona smiled timidly. “Aww. You have a big heart.” As she neared the walkway to the bathroom--stomach unsettled, toes soundless on carpet--she suggested, “How about a movie? Just let me shower first. I feel dirty.”

“‘Dirty’ doesn’t begin to describe you.”

She froze, loose-jawed. “Chan...”

“Am I that revolting, Yoona?”

“What are you--”

“Am I?!” he roared, bottom teeth rattling with his chin. “I knew you hid your true colors. Still, to go this far.”

Her abdominals churned; frighteningly so. The doctor promised the procedure had gone without a hitch. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“We have the same friends and they’ve known me longer! Did you think you’d get away with this?!”

The woman--Chanhwi’s racquetball partner--suggested the after-hours clinic. She’d been vocal about going through a similar ordeal and Yoona thought of no other person to request a ride.

She expected the secret to get out...just not so soon. “I can’t do this. I had to--”

The drum of a wooden drawer cut her short. She’d viewed her boyfriend’s heavy vintage furniture with a soft fondness; though, nothing fond came to mind at the metal object winking at her.

“Chan, not this again.”

“I pointed this at my head too many times tonight,” he muttered, swinging the handgun like any drunken man would. “Don’t you want your own family?”

“Someday,” she answered as a motionless post. Unflinching. Chanhwi’s teary, dramatic outbursts weren’t new, especially when he was under a lot of stress.

“Then, why’d you get rid of it? Our child.”

Yoona’s eyes flooded, mimicking the downfall outside their home. “It’s too soon.”

“You wouldn’t be alone. You’d have me.”

“I don’t--” She clutched her stomach through her hoody. “I don’t want to have kids with you.”

He cocked the gun. “I’m all you have.”

“That’s...” Yoona’s eyes darted to his loose handle, how he waggled the opening at his veined, throbbing neck. “That’s true. Don’t do anything rash, Chan.”

“Why not?”

“I care about you.”

“Huh,” he chuckled. Sounding mad. Thankfully, the gun unwedged from his jaw. “You care about me, but you can’t love me. Because you’re a lesbian, correct?”


“We share a bed, Yoona. A woman who sleeps with any ol’ body isn’t a lesbian. She’s a tramp.”

“You’re wasted. Put the gun down.”

“Tonight, you’ve committed a crime against nature. How’s that feel?”

Yoona stringed through her long, wet hair. As base and foolish as her freshman year. “Empty.”

“E-Empty?!” He pulsed red. Handgun knuckles white. “Where’s my charismatic girlfriend? How deluded can you be not to see the...the enormity of what you’ve done?”

“I don’t know.”

“Our miracle...”

Chanhwi wasn’t the type for miracles, karma, faith hocus-pocus. “It really isn’t-”

“A miracle,” he emphasized. “And you’ve snuffed it like a parasite.”

“The gun, Chan.”

“What’s family to you?”

“Stop swinging it.”

“I’m your only family.”

“Shut up alread--”

“My legacy goes down the drain for-”


The next sequence of events sped via fate’s remote: another shouting match, an unstable hand slamming the gun to the desk, the trigger sounding off, a bullet piercing her flesh, the blood, the crying, the ticks and tocks. All fast-forwarded. Then, shrouded in kinetic black as the police burst into their residence. The Void vacuumed Yoona in like a black hole.

Dead. Dead again.

Floating, drifting as another piece of cosmic debris.

Yoona’s throat ached in a scream for her life, for her angel, for...


A sweet child’s voice. A child who had a name.


“Why do you cry in your sleep, Yoomie?”

Awake, Yoona peered at her desk lamp’s yellow light. Indeed, salt drained to the corners of her lips.


It meant nothing pre-demise, but now...

She wrapped her visitor into a fast, desperate hug. “Mommies get sad, too.”

“Even Mummy?”

Yoona put some space between them to kiss her soft forehead, a button nose, two cheeks that’d dimple if Haeun didn’t look so glum. “Can’t sleep?”

“I...” Wispy brows sank; fingers wound into her Yoomie’s hair. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?” Intuition lassoed her gaze down to Haeun’s cloud-print jammies. A distinct splotch darkened the front of her pants and Yoona’s tears dried. “Babes, you don’t have to apologize for that.”

“Yes, I do.”

This stubborn kid. Forever fixated on her ‘grown-up’ behavior. “It happens. Let’s get you squeaky clean, okay?”

Haeun fastened onto Yoona’s wrist the second she vacated the bed. Helpless fingers trembling, relentless.

Admittedly, the woman adored this attention. As if Haeun’s world would fall apart without her. When, in actuality, it was the complete opposite.

“Where’s Mummy?”

Yoona’s voice flattened. “At work.”

Jessica stowed away to her office often and tonight was no different. After the kids were safely tucked into bed, she’d throw on a coat and peace out for hours.

“Why?” Haeun asked, earning a reassuring pat on the head.

“She’s making money for Christmas presents.”

“I want Mummy.”

Yoona did, too. Grudgingly. “How about this--you’ll clean up in me and Mummy’s bathroom and I’ll let you wear one of my pajama shirts.”

“Really?” Her little face brightened.

Without further ado, she attended their daughter to the master bathroom. Noting Haeun’s independent nature in this area, Yoona stuck to the basics. Running the water to a fair heat. Fetching the fuzziest towel from a cabinet. Flicking her wet hands at the girl’s face to make her squeal.

Yoona thumbed through body washes while Haeun discarded her stained clothing. Perfumed scents like lavender mint were too sexy for the 5-year-old. Instead, she collected lesser-used containers from under the sink.

“Mummy has ‘Ginger Orange’ and ‘Vanilla Coconut’. Pick your poison.”

Flopping kiddish arms in her nudity, Haeun chose the ‘Vanilla Coconut’ bottle.

Yoona would’ve assumed so--it was purple.

“Which one to do use, Yoomie?”

“Oh.” She shrugged, reaching for her usual. “Mango something? I buy whatever.”

“Mix your ‘Mango Something’ with Mummy’s ‘Vanilla Coconut’. Then, I’ll smell like both of you!”

Yoona beamed. “You amaze me, you know that?”

“When will I get boobies, Yoomie?”

Groaning, she guided Haeun into her bath, relaying the only suitable response: “When you can pay rent.”


Tiffany arrived at the Im household in an inside-out bathrobe. She hand-raked her disheveled hair, shuffled sheep slippers to the cleaning cabinet, and concocted a homemade urine-removing potion like a domestic alchemist.

As a fan blew the mattress dry in a loud hum, Yoona read a book on French Bulldogs to Haeun until she knocked out on her and Jessica’s bed. Sighing, Yoona touched her lips to Haeun’s warm temple. Wishing, hoping for her daughter to stay young as long as possible. This stage in her life held purity, endless wonder. Peeing didn’t sully the experience--only enhanced it.

Boobies and adulthood could wait.

“Glad I called an expert.” Yoona removed a hot mug from the espresso machine. “Bedwetting eluded me.”

Tiffany smiled puffy eyes, opting for a glass of brandy. “Deal with it once and it’s ingrained in your mind. You’re welcome.”

They drank silently after that. The brunette passed her uneasiness as paranoia. Fany’s ex--That Man stepped up to the plate, using paid time off to take The Trips (even Thing #3) to his city apartment for a week of ‘Daddy Awesomeness’.

Ample opportunities for Fany to get shut-eye. Yet, following Day Two, she’d withdrawn into a slight depression.

“How are your little Things?” Yoona asked, grasping Tiffany’s tense fingers.

“Having the times of their lives,” she whined. “I doubt they miss me.”

She snorted. “Is this why you’re so bleak? Jealousy?”

“That knuckle-dragger loves sports and manages their hyperactiveness like Dr. Phil. I’m the shrill harpy.”

“You’re extraordinary. We all know it.”

Tiffany pulled her hand away, placing it in her lap. “What if they want to stay with him permanently?”

“They won’t.” Yoona believed her words. “Custody’s a bitch. However, you provide stable shelter, food not out a box, and freedom to run around, to terrorize the neighborhood.”

“Don’t forget my kickass band equipment in the basement.”

The basement. Yoona paled. “Their mom’s a rock star, too! Don’t worry. They love you and That Man equally, but you’re home for them.”

“True.” Fany’s teeth peeked in a smarmy grin. “I can iron and arrange a tie better than him, you know. I bet my boys’ uniforms are sloppy all week.”

“That’s the spirit.”

“Im offspring doing well?”

“Haeun’s brainy and talkative. Bitchy Mrs. Ban cited a ‘bossy streak’ on her latest progress report.”

“Thing Two sticks his bloody scabs in girls’ hair,” Tiffany chuckled, echoing Yoona’s shudder. “And Joonie? How’s my pretty boy?”

“Still pretty. I watched him practice the other day. He’ll make a good goalie.”

“Jessica’s been skipping our gym sessions.”

“She’s doubling hours at the office. Skipping you, skipping me...” Yoona chipped a dot of dried honey off the table, tone salty. “Then, she overbooks our children. Potentially forcing them to be as pressured as--.”

“Hey, now,” Tiffany interjected, lowering her glass. “Remember our recent escapades? You cut a side-bitch loose and burst into tears at an apartment you can’t explain.”

“I thought we were the Lonely Hearts Joggers. Let me vent.”

Her friend pinched the bridge of her nose. “I know, I know, Yoona. This week is making me sensitive or something.”

“When’s Ctrl+Ex’s next practice? Since Jessica ruined it last.”

“I’ll text you.”

“I have no idea what to do with her. She’s fucking evasive, absent at night. Work, kids, work, kids, work and no room for me.”

“Have you mentioned the breakup?”

Yoona pounded a clenched fist. “Yes--and it didn’t help! If she’s not staring through me, she’s glaring machetes at my throat. I’m here, doing everything I can to cross this bridge--”

“Are you?”

“Sure I am!”

Are you?“ Tiffany enunciated, black pupils seeking Yoona’s for something the latter couldn’t hide. “How awful was the basement fight?”

“The worst.”


Yoona felt a drip at her brow. “Jessica....she threatened to kill me.”

“She blew off steam.”

“Are you taking her side? After everything I’ve done to fix this?”

“Jessica loves the shit out of you.”

Yoona scoffed, gulping foamy heat.

“Be frank with me, Reformed Two-Timer. Why would she threaten you?”

“Ah-about...” Disdain for her alter self returned. “Joonie.”

“Jessica--like myself--is a fierce Mama Bear. Mess with her cubs and she’ll strike for blood, no matter who poses a danger.”

“Are you calling me dangerous?”

“The signs are clear,” Tiffany droned, leveling eye contact, “Your son’s afraid of you.”

The sentence sucker-punched Yoona in the chest. Of course she could tell. By how his eyes--eyes so similar to her own--widened in suspicion whenever she joked with him or leaned in too closely. He studied her smiles, pouted constantly, and hailed ‘Mummy’ as his patron saint.

“I’m trying to redeem myself, Fany. It’s...it’s not working.”

“Try harder! He’s three years old; his memories only go so far. And most of them consist of you...” Tiffany brandished a finger as she recounted, “Ribbing at his clothes, his dainty mannerisms, his co-ed team. Buying him shit you know he doesn’t want. Calling him ‘confused’ to his face for loving Batman one day and Sailor Moon the next. Remember when Jessica let him grow his hair long?”

Yoona didn’t. She couldn’t.

“You snipped it yourself! That’s traumatizing! Yes, Jessica can be a conceited fucking tyrant; though if I fault her for anything, it’s exposing Joonie to you at your cruelest.”

“I’ve changed. Really.”

“Words mean jack shit. Show him.”

An irrational side of Im Yoona seethed. Tiffany might’ve been speaking infinite truths, so why the hell should she be persecuted in Alter-Yoona’s place? Why’d she deserve this punishment? “Fine.”

Accepting the weak reply, Tiffany continued, “Thing One wet the bed during my rockiest divorce period. Children pick up on the strain in our marriages. We try to protect them, yet...”

“Jessica doesn’t listen. She won’t even respect my hobbies.”

“‘Noise pollution’...that was mean,” the woman agreed. “Jessica’s methodical, goal-oriented. And as unromantic as this sounds, you’re her goal of a wife. She naïvely holds onto your finer qualities.”

“Naïve?” Yoona couldn’t pin that on her savage wife.

“Yes, naïve. Yoona, my marriage shattered when That Man stopped fighting for it. The light in his dumb eyes...they fizzled. I made the call.” Tiffany stood to rinse her cup, shyly wiping her cheek as she passed. “Regardless of his height, lucrative career, arms that could bench press ten of me, and a hardly-tragic thinning patch, we were screwed if he gave up.”

“I see.”

“Jessica went full bitch on our band--doesn’t mean she wasn’t onto something. We are a bunch of losers. Sooyoung, Jinki, the rest of Ctrl+Ex lost the marriage gamble. That’s why we support one another.”

Yoona stretched in the chair and exhaled. “Will I hit my limit, too?”

“You’re my bestie,” Tiffany uttered thickly, heading for the exit, “and truthfully--had I been you or Jessica--I would’ve hired a lawyer years ago.”


The ringing of keys, fresh scent of perfume, and skin-tingling match of tired eyes brought Chanhwi’s voice to mind:

“When you wait up all night for someone, you know it’s love.”

Yoona restrained strong reflexes, temperature spiking at even the visual of Jessica stone-solid and rooted in defense upon arrival.

Fights in the midst of years-long tension bred the worst comments. If Jessica’s death threat and jabs about her womb were heat-of-the-moment taunts, Yoona was motivated to clear the air. To put this filthy past behind them.

Jessica cracked the silence. “Drinking at this hour?”

Biting her cheek, Yoona’s traced the neck of the brandy bottle. “I haven’t taken a sip.”

“Sure.” She perched a duffel bag on the couch before padding to the refrigerator, cadence absolutely chilling. “What if Haeun or Joonie needed you? Could you at least try to be in commission while I’m out?”

Yoona was too distracted by the duffel to bicker. So prone to fleeing in the night, her wife actually designated luggage for it. “Haeun wet the bed.”

Jessica slammed the fridge to face her across the kitchen. “Oh?”

“She’s clean. Fany and I set the mattress aside. It’s taken care of.”

“Where’s Haeun sleeping?”

“In our bed.”

Yoona intercepted the mama bear’s swift exit, using her height to her advantage. Tenacious fingers webbed into the sleeves of Jessica’s shirt, holding her at bay. “Sica. I’m tired of fighting.”

“I’m not.”

Sooyeon.“ She shivered when her once-angel’s eyes rose in piercing defiance. “We can’t live like this. It sucks for you, me, and it influences our children.”

“Coach Jonghyun called yesterday. Have you been ditching Joonie’s practices?”

Shit. “Not all of them.”

“Haeun’s too?”

“Yes, Sica.”

Jessica’s bottom lip arched in pure rage. “I fucking pay for their lessons! What nerve of you to interfere?”

“They’re three and five,” Yoona growled, not keen on being scolded. “Why would kids their age need hours of extracurriculars?”

“Children thrive on routine, for your information. You’re spoiling them.”

“I’m a criminal for lightening their load?” Yoona released her to pace a circle around the dining table. “Haeun and Joonie deserve to be kids Jessica! Your incessant mother-henning is gonna send them into therapy before puberty! They’ll resent you.”

Jessica crossed her arms, watching. “Not just me.”

“I’m not the same. Joonie should trust me.”

“By neglecting his agenda?”

“They kick a damn ball for hours. He could do that here.”

“Who are you?” The shorter woman marched forward, sharpening leery eyes. “Jonghyun’s a capable, gay coach of both boys and girls. Or would you rather someone who’d try to ‘toughen him up’ like the Trips’ douchebag macho instructor? Have you forgotten? Amnesia, perhaps?”

“Not amnesia.”

“Then, listen. I’ll say this once.” Jessica’s composure resurfaced--speech diamond-cut, gestures elegantly arced. “Look past the cleats and nets and uniforms. Dismantle your pigeon-holed, prejudiced point of view and you’d understand, Yoomie. Joonie’s more than a wannabe goalie. He’s a legitimate, approved member of a team.”

Yoona had never been called a bigot a day in her past life. “Sica--”

Jessica’s head shake shut her up. “Haeun’s a strong-willed girl, but she fits in fine. Minjoon won’t have the same privileges...he’s different.” She shot a glance to stairs that led to their bedrooms. “And if you searched beyond the sport, you’d notice his closest teammates don’t fit gender molds, either. It’s crucial for Joonie to have a like-minded, social bubble. Because they won’t be plentiful as they get older, as their bodies change.”

Dumbfounded, Yoona bit her lip.


“Yoona, Joonie hasn’t expressed dislike for his genitals or labeled himself other than ‘boy’. He’s eclectic, as I’ve said. Though, I’m prepared for anything and I’ll always be in his corner.”

“M-me, too. I swear.”

“Big claims call for big evidence,” Jessica whispered, smoothing a crease in Yoona’s shirt.

The gentle stroke swelled her heart. “I won’t forget, Sica.”

“Did you forget that you love me?”

A fat tear wet Yoona’s cheek. “It’s complicated.”

“I love you too much,” she confessed. “My family doesn’t tolerate us. You parents couldn’t. Our children are virtually grandparent-less. We’re all they have, Yoong.”

Parents. Somewhere in an alternate land, they lamented her death. Destined to visit her body in a morgue, ashen and empty.

Yoona considered the emails’ lack of parental talk a bad omen. Either Alter-Yoona and Hyelim wouldn’t discuss the subject--highly unlikely--or it’d been deleted, suited for phone conversations. More the reason to be conflicted.

“I’ll meet you in bed later.” She hastily backed from Jessica’s fingers, scared of what was to come. “Will you be up?”

“Study time?”

“This won’t take long.”

Jessica sighed, “I’ve heard that one.”

“Sica, I promise.”

“Do whatever you want.” She heaved the duffel to her shoulder, looking so small. As small as Yoona probably seemed to her. “Nothing you do behind locked doors will amount to me. You have no idea how lucky you are.”

Funny. Yoona didn’t feel lucky.


How sad that estrangement provided the cheeriest option to explain the lack of anything parent-related in Yoona’s study. Nothing on her phone, no names rang a bell on social media, no checks signed in her father’s slanty penmanship.

No pictures.

Yoona swiped to her go-to: Jessica and Haeun asleep beneath the fort. Besides the popup book, it bent her lips into a grin any and every time.

Why the fuck couldn’t the world progress faster? Her wife was human.

The Void didn’t judge; it produced choices, free will. How could some ignoramus see this photo or Joonie’s pigtails or Haeun’s framed dragon painting and declare, “Blasphemy. All of it.”?

If anything, hell was on earth.

“Yep,” Yoona agreed at her desktop, entering her parents’ names into a search bar. “This is hell.”

In her former life, her parents’ hell would be rushing to the hospital. Blaming themselves for not preventing the unforeseen. Planning funeral arrangements. Burying their headstrong 28-year-old in the family plot. Outliving their only child.

And paralleled in a way only beautiful in fiction, Yoona mourned, too. For the present timeline, Yoona’s parents died a year after she graduated college. Her father from a short battle with colon cancer, followed by her mom the next year by natural causes--’a broken heart,’ as quoted in a short article written by...Im Yoona.

God damnit.

She regretted her selfish, reckless years. Was Chanhwi worth the time she could’ve invested into her family? A universe away, did her homophobic living parents wish to undo their arguments?

Grief wedged a tight knot in her throat. Yoona was drowning, physically weak at bereavement’s acute impact.

“This isn’t fair.”

She wanted to scream.

She wanted to curse.

She wanted to smash that fucking desktop.

To point to the heavens, accuse it of lying.

Her parents were alive. Somewhere, out there.

Though, it hurt just the same.

Her phone buzzed. Twice.

“Hye, take a hint.” She almost typed it, stopping short of honoring any message from here on out. Replies powered the relationship, no matter the content.

No more of this weaning bullshit.

Nevertheless, seeing Hyelim’s name invoked her final discovery that night. Chanhwi.

Maybe his alternate didn’t own a gun. Chose not to bed vulnerable students. Shacked up with a woman who enjoyed his sex. Took a path without murder or manslaughter or whatever the courts rules upon.

He wasn’t the worst man; he could be happy.

The results justified Lady Yang’s hesitance at the apartment. Yoona double-clicked and backtracked and confirmed names and photos for proof. Getting the same dire outcome.

Instinctively, her cold hand rubbed her stomach beneath light cotton.

Chanhwi died. He accidentally shot himself while making a drunken point to his fiancée.

She was pretty. In her twenties.

He fell short to similar calamities. Still had a position as a prestigious professor and a penchant for stylish undercuts before he fucked up anyway.

The line between this universe and the last weren’t so vast after all.


More than disappointing. Tragic. Depressing.

Yoona schooled her breathing, recalling Chanhwi’s miracle talk. It was entirely out of his character.

Then, it occurred to her.

She and Chan--she cringed--had always been slack about protection. No pregnancy scares whatsoever. So, for years, she considered herself lucky.

What if Yoona wasn’t lucky? Just...unable.

Until her periods stopped. And as Chanhwi celebrated the early trimester victory, Yoona rushed to a clinic to extinguish this so-called miracle. One more thing would’ve kept her bound at his side.


Im Yoona logged out the computer.

She had a lot of mourning to do. Specifically, for her parents, Chanhwi, Alter-Yoona’s soul, her own fertility, and her innocence.

Yoona descended from the third floor. Paced for a minute in Joonie’s room. Turned the fan on Haeun’s mattress to low.

Her body grew dense, burdened by tears heavier than metal. She shuffled into the lamp-lit master bedroom, on the verge of collapse. Even a breakthrough. And finally, she slumped onto the bed with Jessica and a sleeping Haeun.

Jessica gasped. “What’s wrong?”

Too much was wrong. Tremors wracked Yoona’s body.

“Yoong? Tell me.”

“My parents are dead,” the brunette wailed into comforter, too taken by tapered fingers caressing her back. “My-my parents are dead and I’m sorry.”


The minutes flew by in a blur. Yoona hadn’t bawled uncontrollably since she came out to her parents. Or the night she nodded yes, allowing Chanhwi to undress her.

Two firsts she’d despise to revisit.

“I’m s-sorry, Sooyeon. I’m sorry,” she hiccuped, submerged in a steaming bathtub.

Jessica slid a pillow beneath Yoona’s cheek. “Shh. I’m listening. I know.”

She would belabor the apology until her throated rawed. “I’ll try harder. I’ll do better.”

“So will I.”

Blinking wet lashes, Yoona whimpered, “Don’t shoot me.”

Jessica’s heavy eyelids batted in reply. Obviously disturbed. “Why would I...”

“The affair’s over. Forever.”

“I’ve treated you like a peon, Yoong.” Her wife stared downward. “And...that comment about your womb was vile. I regret it so much.”

“I regret more than that.”

“It’s not my intention to make you feel inadequate. I mean, we’ve been angry at each other for a long time.”


“I’ve noticed your changes. You act how you did before Joonie and it’s confusing and irresistible and...” Jessica absently drew circles in the bathwater from her seat on the tile floor. “Is this helping?”

Lavender mint wafted through the warm bathroom. “I’m a disaster.”

“Mmm, kinda.”

Yoona’s grin returned like an old friend. “Rude, Sica.”

“You’re a beautiful disaster, if that’s any consolation.”

In the aromatic depths, she felt weightless. Not similar to the Void. “Joonie’s a good kid.”

Smiling, Jessica squeezed a loofah over Yoona’s shoulders. “Our son’s incredible.”

“He’s afraid of me.”

Jessica folded her arms onto the tub’s ledge. Her chin lay on top. “Joonie perceives what we hand him, Yoong. It’s reversible, if you’re patient.”

“I can be patient.” Yoona cupped a wet hand onto Jessica’s cheek. Her wife’s layer-free skin, untraced eyes, faintly pink lips, naturally soft voice rendered her mesmerized. She caressed until her shyness bled through. “Mm, your cute side. Its sexy. Sexy-cute.”

“You’re babyfaced yourself.”

Hamming it up, Yoona puppy whimpered. “Is that why you take care of me?”

“I take care of you because I love you.”

Jessica’s said that twice tonight. Yoona could kick herself for her delay. “I love you, too, sexy-cute lady.”

Her lips shaped a quiet smile. “Babe, you were hysterical.”

“It kinda hit me...about my parents.”

“Talk to me.”

Not yet. Yoona decided to bring up a more abstract topic. “Something phenomenal--no, sublime brought us together.”


She clenched her jaw, handling her confession like glass. “I believe there are multiple worlds, universes, dimensions out there. Limitless possibilities, outcomes. In some, you’re a celestial being, even.”

“This is new,” Jessica whispered into a barely-there kiss to Yoona’s nose. “Go on.”

“In others...” Their lips coasted, touched mostly by breath. “...we’re strangers, doomed to stay that way.”

“That’s so sad.”

“It is. And I’m fortunate the dice rolled in my favor, Sica. I missed you.”

Jessica initiated a feverish merge of mouths, murmuring, “You’re too charming.”

More than charm. It was the truth.

Yoona kissed back, high on bliss she hadn’t experienced since Haeun’s class visit. It transcended all the laughs with Chanhwi, the pretentious banter with his cronies, the anonymous women bedded. Even though the previous life sculpted her to be the woman licking passion to her true love’s ear, it’d run its course.

That ‘game’ ended.

“I fucking missed your tongue,” Jessica exhaled, sliding nails down Yoona’s slick back.

“Keep it down,” Yoona warned. “Our censor’s beyond the door.”

“She’s asleep.”

Yoona raked in a handful of syrupy hair, lurching her into a full-tongued lip lock. This Jessica expressed lust and panting, vocal adoration. Slipping from her designer-clad constraints, nixing mature obligations to fit Yoona’s other hand into her camisole. Over a breast swollen with want.

“No bra,” she moaned to Jessica’s neck, halfway out the water. “Hand me a towel.”

Seconds later, the roughness of cotton and Jessica’s frisky hands swept along her body. They held each other standing--tongues coiled, moans in sync, eyes closed.

“Your training’s not complete.”

Yoona giggled at the office reference, severing their kiss to rasp, “What should I do?”

“Eat me out.”

Her eyes blackened to predatory. She eased Jessica into the sink counter, too aroused to lift her up. “My god, Ms. Jung. Where are your manners?”

“I’ll show you where.”

And, in another fantasy conjured by a teenaged Im Yoona, a beautiful businesswoman gnarled at her long dark hair and steered her--along her creamy neck, between silk-covered breasts, past deliciously feminine abs--down to paradise. Her knees collided to the floor and her stare lost no contact with Jessica’s.

Jessica mewled in a short spasm, husking, “Your eyes can undo me.”

“Let’s give my mouth a chance.”


Everything was exquisite. The sound of shorts sliding on hairless skin. The look, smell of Jessica’s sex. Heady anticipation.

Saliva built up as she lapped her first sample. Then, a thirsty mouthful that beckoned her thumbs to fan out succulent flesh, for her lips to pump shallowly. Her angel whined, begging Yoona to straight-up pierce her with that talented tongue.

Which she wouldn’t refuse.

And Yoona’s eyes rolled shut. Thankful, insurmountably thankful for the rain check to expire.

Her tongue at the perfect angle, in rapid beats that smothered her in want. Thumbs working in tandem, denial of air spurring a foreign sort of pleasure, neck bobbing, and a delicate, polished grip setting the pace.

She could get lost like this, live an eternity on her knees.


The moans from above changed. Gradually, but obvious enough for Yoona to reluctantly rise to her full height.


Face glossy, Jessica swallowed. “Do you love her?”

Yoona wiped around her mouth with the back of her hand. “It’s over. I told you.”

“Did you?”

There were a handful of ways to answer--Yoona landed on her honest, personal feelings. For, she couldn’t speak on Alter-Yoona’s behalf. “No, Sica.”

“She called me at my office today. Her name’s Hyelim?”

Ice shot through her veins. Anger. “What?”

“From an unmarked number. She...she introduced herself as a farewell, I guess. Sounded devastated.” Jessica licked beneath the taller woman’s lip. “She claimed that you chose me in the end. As if we were in some twisted competition.”


“And I calmly, succinctly told her to fuck off.”

Yoona’s jaw twitched. Was it appropriate to nervous-laugh at a moment like this?

“I’m done tonight,” Jessica sighed, shorts snapping back onto her hips. “Sleep downstairs.”

“I didn’t kno--”

“We’ll discuss this another time.”

Paradise, lust, love left the master bathroom. Yoona’s pulse throbbed into her reddened ears.

All Alter-Yoona’s fault.

Making it Yoona’s fault, too.


Yoona tore her study into shreds.

Searching, seeking.

Flipping, unhinging, shuffling, needing a hint. Cursing fate whilst simultaneously pleading for a sign. Anything.

When, obviously, an entity didn’t part her ceiling like the Red Sea, she tumbled into her chair.

Yoona and Jessica were too fucking deprived of intimacy. An exchange of trust, desire, fingers, saliva--but mostly trust.

She deleted Hyelim’s messages. Deactivated the secret account. Unsynced anything tying her to Alter-Yoona’s treacherous past and present.

To relax, she opened Jessica and Haeun’s photo again.

Still beautiful, yet a pointy-browed somebody was missing. Her favorite picture should include him, too.

Yoona dropped the phone and strolled to the single unflipped image on her wall. Haeun’s dragon. She wondered if Joonie had any artistic talent as well. Even if he didn’t, he deserved to grace her study gallery.

Resembling old Haeun-preferring ‘Yoomie’ wouldn’t do. What fluttered in Im Minjoon’s genderfluid mind?

Seriously, Yoona would torch an actual Picasso before bending a corner of this kindergarten masterpiece. What museum rubbish could outdo the golden glitter clouds or its blocky foreground castle?

“Wait a minute.” Biting her lip, Yoona analyzed the streaky tempera strokes. “Ah, that’s too small to be a castle. I think it’s a book.”

Her nerd princess would paint a bookworm dragon.

Intrigued, the mother glanced up at the suspended shelves of forgotten books. It’d be a long shot.

Though, she had nothing to lose.

Im Yoona leafed through droves of novels, anthologies, magazines, manhwas, and dusty manuals. Praising Haeun and her impulses once she spotted the shell of an unnamed hardcover. Inside, she found hope.

In a ring.

Sunrise gleamed onto the band of polished silver between her papercut fingertips. And Yoona smiled.



Thanks to wiildestdreams for making the awesome gifs. :keesies:

Current Mood: shockedshocked
Current Music: FIESTAR (피에스타)- You’re pitiful (짠해)
sataengsminion: pic#124684100sataengsminion on January 9th, 2016 05:03 am (UTC)
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 = me.

Did I ever tell you how much I love Haeun? ;_; I feel like haven't said it enough. Always throwing all my love to Joonie, because baby boy is precious. Too precious for this world. Haeun, my precious, curios, little dinosaur. orz

Forget winning Jessica back. Yoona should win Joonie back. Winning Joonie i feel would make everything better. you better not hurt my baby boy, I'll hunt you down

I'll cry the day we finally get the smut(taeyeon just updated ig and shes akdjsjdjd cute ;_;) LArth Vader sunbaenim, please. All jokes aside, that was my favorite part of the chapter. Ugh now i can't reall-- no! I'll have to edit this again once i read from the beginning, again.

r0000d, i wasnt done.

THERE IS HOPE. GDI THAT'S TWICE NOW. Yoona found the ring. I'm rooting for you, baby gay! ;_;

its 8:04am, not 7, still delivered. Not as good as the others buuuut 😄😄

Edited at 2016-01-14 04:06 pm (UTC)
checkinyourbra: krystal01checkinyourbra on January 16th, 2016 07:47 am (UTC)
AYYYYYY HOT FIYAH. //lovingly gazes at your userpic

THESE PRECIOUS BABIES. STEALING ALL THE HEARTS. Thanks for loving them. ;_____; I lub them, toooo <333

”Winning Joonie i feel would make everything better.”—Heyyyyy you’re onto something there. ;DDD …>.> I SEE YOUR THREATS. MEANIE.

HAHAHAH OMG LARTH VADER SUNBAENIM. You’ve released that name into the world. xDDD…I’m not shocked that the sex scene caught you’re attention. <.<

Who’s r000d!?!? >:(((

H-hope?!? Where?!?!?! //edits out

Your comments just fine. Thank youuuuuuu <333
I la- la- la- love youregreted on January 9th, 2016 05:35 am (UTC)
i've bene wating for this for so long!!!!

insight OMG!!!!!!!
so that's what went down with chanhwi!!!!!!
okay so first, at the beginning i figured chanhwi was some kind of gangster or like black market dealer i mean it never occurred to me that a regular old philandering prof would shoot someone in a fit of rage over is legacy on planet earth.

buttttttttttttt! it makes sense that yoong's new life would reflect something so significant in the existence of her strong maternal bond with haeun and even with minjoon. and damn damn damn! the realness of finding out your moms and pops had passed knowin things weren't right between ya.

no wonder she fell apart.

i have more to say on the unfolding events however i'm concerned over the ending will we know what's happened in the void, is it real, will we ever understand where og yoomie is or went? i want happyeverafter yoonsic but i'm worried... cos i don't know you might pull a fast one on us.

goshi'm always anticipating your updates stay well and do goodthings!

Edited at 2016-01-09 06:20 am (UTC)
checkinyourbra: yoona03checkinyourbra on January 13th, 2016 08:41 am (UTC)
B-but it's only been a week. DOES IT FEEL LONGER??? D:

Yes, insight!! And--*snorts*--did you really say "philandering prof"?!?! HAHAHAHH You never fail to crack me up. xDD

Yep, Yoong's current life is kinda the flip side of her old life. Super significant when it comes to her this connection with her children. And yeahhhh...her parents. :(((

" i want happyeverafter yoonsic but i'm worried... cos i don't know you might pull a fast one on us."--Whoooo? Meeeee? *innocent smile*

hehehhehe I hope I do your expectations justice, babe. Until next time~~~
하류cateyes330 on January 9th, 2016 06:35 am (UTC)


So I sincerely apologize for my tardiness. >< But here's my comment lol

So I find Chanhwi to be a very creepy/scary man. I hold my breath whenever he comes up because he's kinda unpredictable. Either way, I'm glad Yoona's not living that life anymore. Maybe I should thank him for shooting her? Hahaha or maybe she never lived that life to beginning with and this is just inception or a wake up call for Yoomie to get her shit together. Whatever it is, it's working.

Ehhhh things are getting better-ish with Jessica and Joonie? lol I like how she really cares for the kids' well being. Maybe I'm just biased but I don't believe in stressful schooling in Asia in general. Like what the hell? I'm so glad I didn't have to live through that. I've seen kids with Asian international kids with gray hair before they hit 20.... scares the shit out of me. Hopefully Yoona and balance out Jessica's strictness with the kids.

And SHIT Hyelim did what? Dang that lady is bold! I mean like why would you want to know you're the third person in someone's relationship... However, I'm kinda glad she did that because she basically cleared the air for Yoona and Jessica. Also I laughed when Yoona deleted her dirt. Hahaha like I said before, should have done that from the beginning. Hehehehe

Anyway, I'm off to the next chapter. Thanks, Bra! Catch you later!

Edited at 2016-01-18 06:27 am (UTC)
checkinyourbra: jessica02checkinyourbra on February 3rd, 2016 01:41 pm (UTC)
Waaaaahhhh how’d I miss this one?! D;

I apologize for missing this comment. hahaha

Your creepdar for him may not be far off. He’s quick unpredictable. D:

”Maybe I should thank him for shooting her?”—LOL interesting thought there. He had only one job. Orrrr, the inception thingy you mentioned. Whichever.

Ughhhhh ultra-strict schooling. That’s a whole conversation on its own. Everything needs balance. And you’re right—hopefully, Yoona can tilt the scale for the kids.

HYELIM WAS SHAMELESS THERE. Shameless, yet she made things more clear. Thank goodness he made that call AFTER the breakup. hahahaha.


(Anonymous) on January 9th, 2016 08:42 am (UTC)
Damn. This chapter broke my heart. From Yoona discovering that her parents are dead and breaking down to Jessica crying in the middle of intimacy and asking Yoona if she loved Hyelim.

As much as I'd love for Jessica and Yoona to quickly reconcile, there is a lot they have to work through first. Yoona's years-long affair is sure to have taken a toll on Jessica, and it's unrealistic to expect her to be so readily accepting of Yoona and her change. Yoona's so eager to make things right, and Jessica can't help but have reservations. You were able to capture Jessica's emotions and inner conflict perfectly, despite it being from an outside point of view.

Yoona wearing her ring again is a good start though. I liked how this chapter kind of mirrored some of the others in that it ended with talk of Yoona's wedding ring, but this time, it symbolized hope and something optimistic.

God. Again, I'm eager for more, and I'm looking forward to seeing what happens next. I'm so thankful for your quick, consistent updates; it's something I look forward to at the end of every week.
(Anonymous) on January 9th, 2016 11:51 pm (UTC)
Oh! Something I just realized. I remember when Yoona opened up about her parents to Jessica in a previous chapter, and I remember being kind of iffy about that part because like... Wouldn't Jessica know about Yoona's parents and what they're like? However, rather than reacting with confusion as to why Yoona was telling stuff about her family which she already knew or which may not be true, Jessica got emotional and said that this was so sudden. It makes sense now; alter-Yoona's parents died before her relationship with Jessica, and it seems that alter-Yoona did not like talking about her late parents, so that's why Jessica reacted the way she had.

Also! This whole thing's got me thinking... Yoona's problem in her past life was being very passive and settling for a life she did not want. Here, in this timeline, she's resolving that problem by actively working to fix alter-Yoona's relationship in order to make the life that she's always dreamed of. Furthermore, alter-Yoona's family mirrors Yoona's family, which is also part of why she's so determined to fix things.

Alter-Yoona's problem in her life was ignoring her issues with her family by turning to someone else and forcing her child to be someone he's not. In Yoona's past life, her life was the result of her parents trying to stifle Yoona's identity and her distancing herself from her family and turning towards another figure. Maybe, alter-Yoona was sent to Yoona's life, before Yoona's death, to fix Yoona's shit and in turn, resolve alter-Yoona's own problems, like what's currently happening with Yoona. Furthermore, alter-Yoona's parents are dead while Yoona's parents are alive, just estranged. Alter-Yoona may be motivated by that to repair Yoona's relationship with her parents as well.

And hey. Maybe alter-Yoona would be able to meet alter-Jessica after it all and have a new start with her, doing things right this time. (Which would also resolve my feelings about Yoona stealing alter-Yoona's life.)
(no subject) - checkinyourbra on January 13th, 2016 09:09 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - checkinyourbra on January 13th, 2016 08:59 am (UTC) (Expand)
The9thdawnthe9thdawn on January 9th, 2016 09:03 am (UTC)
You are a very special writer of the best kind. Whatever you do, never lose that passion or flair that brings your words to life. Thank you for your stories, your chapters and that wonderful mind of yours.

checkinyourbra: taeyeon03checkinyourbra on January 13th, 2016 08:46 am (UTC)
I creeped you a bit. You're Seeko!! How've you been?? ^^

Ahdslfdsfdf thankyouthankyouthankyou for appreciating my story, bb. As long as this busy mind of mine stays busy, I'll keep makin' stuff. And hopefully, writing stories stays a longtime thing. :DDD Yeeeyy passion!!

Thanks againnn :$
Maria: pic#125482624AllTooMe on January 9th, 2016 09:56 am (UTC)
OMG this was HEARTBREAKING in so many ways... It felt like a rollercoaster of emotions, getting all depressed in the beginning but then seeing things better and better and better to have them drop again and then THE RING APPEARED so it's okay once again.
It was so beautiful to read this... Got to read it again to see if I missed anything. But your writing is wonderful <3
One of my favourite things about this story is the relationship with the kids. It's so unusual to find stories where kids are involved from the very beginning, and I love how Yoona cares so much about how the kids see her and wants to fix everything Alter-Yoona caused. Because Alter-Yoona really made a mess of things... For a moment there, I thought she was going to tell Tiffany about The Void and everything...
And having Yoona growing so close with Haeun but also a reluctant Joonie... I hope Yoong's efforts will pay off.
We really found out plenty about Chanhwi and his reasons... Yoona before dying must have been so desperate... But so must have Alter-Yoong in the other, with her parents dying... That was so sad to find out.
And the scene with Jessica in bed, like I couldn't believe that was really happening with such a caring Sica and a broken Yoona and it was so perfect... But then Sica was there on the sink reflecting on whatever happened that day and decided to break it off again. But like it's so weird to see them talking about Hyelim so openly, but it also makes it so sad...
And I absolutely love how Yoong found her wedding ring. FINALLY. But the best thing is how you depicted it, how it means hope. That's what matters the most.
But there's so many things we still don't know and I don't know if we ever will... I'm just rooting for a happy ending for them together, but what if she just loses this alternative life as fast as she got it? I'm scared
THANK YOU for your beautiful writing, as always^^
checkinyourbra: jessica01checkinyourbra on January 13th, 2016 09:22 am (UTC)
ANOTHER HEARTBROKEN READER!?!?! C-can I fix it with superglue?? D:

Roller coastersssss YaaaAYAAYYyyyaaaaayyyy :DDDDD

Omg, thank you. Beautiful….//blushes >.<

After this experience, I realized I LOVED writing the kid scenes. There’s something that tickles my maternal side and….yeah. Heheheh it’s a nice change of pace. Alter-Yoona surely made a mess, didn’t she? Too bad Yoona’s left to sweep it up. ;__;

”For a moment there, I thought she was going to tell Tiffany about The Void and everything…”—Oh my. That’d be an interesting turn of events, wouldn’t it. ;)

Wow. I read that next paragraph with the :0 face. Both Yoona’s seemed to have a desperate, sad streak, huh? But Sica became gentle with Yoona at just the right time. When she needed it most. Yeah, Hyelim spoken out loud is strange, but progress~


”But there's so many things we still don't know and I don't know if we ever will…”—That’s certainly a possibility. There’s no way for y’all to know more than Yoona herself.

Keep your fingers crossed for a happy ending~~~ muahahahah
(no subject) - AllTooMe on January 14th, 2016 09:11 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - checkinyourbra on January 16th, 2016 07:50 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - AllTooMe on January 16th, 2016 05:50 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - checkinyourbra on January 17th, 2016 02:38 am (UTC) (Expand)
(Anonymous) on January 9th, 2016 11:48 am (UTC)
Hi there!!!
Thanks for the update I'm so hooked on your story, my gosh. You write beautifully and this is by far one of the best fanfiction I've ever read. I'm so excited to read happy, made-up Yoonsic. PLEASE don't end this in a tragedy :( Keep up the brilliant work!!! I'm stoked for the next update.

P.S. She found her ring!!!! Finally!! I hope sica finds it within herself to trust yoona again soon. It's so sad that she can't trust someone she loves so much.
checkinyourbra: yoona02checkinyourbra on January 13th, 2016 09:26 am (UTC)

Let’s print this fic, roll it up, and smoke it!! Or…..you can continue reading it like normal. >.>

THANK YOUUUUUU for enjoying it so much.

”PLEASE don't end this in a tragedy :(”— :((

PS: The ring, the ring!!! Love and distrusts is a painful mixture. Hopefully, they can go beyond this.

Thanks againnnn <3333
(Anonymous) on January 9th, 2016 02:45 pm (UTC)
Hi there!!!
Thanks for the update I'm so hooked on your story, my gosh. You write beautifully and this is by far one of the best fanfiction I've ever read. I'm so excited to read happy, made-up Yoonsic. PLEASE don't end this in a tragedy :( Keep up the brilliant work!!! I'm stoked for the next update.

P.S. She found her ring!!!! Finally!! I hope sica finds it within herself to trust yoona again soon. It's so sad that she can't trust someone she loves so much.
astro24: pic#125702404astro24 on January 9th, 2016 04:08 pm (UTC)
YES YES YESSSSS!!!!!! *stumbles onto something while happily running around* I-is t-that a-a d-dead b-body....???? HAHAHAHA god I'm so high. What's wrong with me. Be right back!!!! XD

Back back back~~ edit edit edit~~~

While reading the flashback, I was all, uh oh/ oh no/ oh snap!! No no no!!! Hahahaha and... PUT THE GUN DOWN!!! DAMMNNIITTT!!!! >.> wait... This really happened right...? Like... For real...?? It's not one of those silly nightmares... That isn't real....?? Hahahaha *questions everything that's happening in the story* Seriously, Sica's trust issues is rubbing off me. XD

"Flicking her wet hands at the girl’s face to make her squeal."-- why do I find this so cute....???? >.<

" “Mix your ‘Mango Something’ with Mummy’s ‘Vanilla Coconut’. Then, I’ll smell like both of you!” "--- GOD STOP BEING ALL TOO CUTESY HAEUN!!! I cannot breathe!!!! Hahahaha >.<

Oh!!! Ctrl+Ex is the name of their band?!!! This was mentioned in the previous chapter right??!! Did I not read it??? Lol what's wrong with my eyes. Hahahaha

"Yoona stretched in the chair and exhaled. “Will I hit my limit, too?”

“You’re my bestie,” Tiffany uttered thickly, heading for the exit, “and truthfully--had I been you or Jessica--I would’ve hired a lawyer years ago.” "-- I love Fany even more now. Hahahaha idk.... I just do.. Hahaha

"The line between this universe and the last weren’t so vast after all."-- *nods* *thumbs up* *cartwheels* lol

" “You’re a beautiful disaster, if that’s any consolation.” "-- *cringes* hahahahaha

"Im Yoona leafed through droves of novels, anthologies, magazines, manhwas, and dusty manuals. Praising Haeun and her impulses once she spotted the shell of an unnamed hardcover. Inside, she found hope.

In a ring.

Sunrise gleamed onto the band of polished silver between her papercut fingertips. And Yoona smiled."-- I went from series of uh oh's and oh no's to OH MY GOD!! THE RING!! THAT FRICKIN' RING IS FINALLY HERE!!!???? HAHAHAHAHA I hope this will be the key to rebuild trust in this precious marriage/relationship/life/stuff lol. *sobs* *claps* I'M SMILING TOO!!! CAN YOU SEE ME?? CAN YOU???? *waves hand frantically to catch author's attention* Hahahahaha I'm so happy right now, I can't sleep. Lol

*finally faints* *struggles to stand up* Y-yes..... I-I'm..... s-still........ a-alive..... Hahahaha I was actually shocked when I saw Jessica's colorful gay hair for the first time. Lol I was like.... *me checking my social media account* *scrolling down photos* *sees someone with colorful hair* *scrolls down* *goes up again* *gasp* Omo!!! IT'S JESSICA?!!!! HAHAHAHA But wow, she looks soooooo good in those gifs. Sooooo beautiful!!! Ughhhh. So.... So.... Idk. I'm speechless. I was staring for a couple of minutes. Hahahaha And Yoongie~~~~~~ Precious Yoongie~~ such a cutie pie!!!! With cutie pie Taeyeonie too~~~~ Two cutie pies in one photo?! *faints for real* HAHAHAHAHA Goodbye world, it's been a wonderful journey. Hahahahahaha XD

Wow I love this chapter. So many revelations (?). Some or most of my questions (I totally forgot some of them lol) were answered~~~ ha!!! I'm a happy kid now. But really, I'm not bothered anymore as to why Yoong was shot. It's just sad that it was an accident. D: (I totally did one of those overly exaggerated gasps in my mind, since I can't literally do it since I don't wanna disturb sleeping people. Hahaha) But I think it did good to her....(?) since she was able to experience a different life, maybe one that she really really wanted. Or... Or... Idk. Idk what to feel anymore. HAHAHAHA Ah, I can't wait to read more!!!! Hehehehe I wonder how would Yoomie prove herself worthy of Sica's trust again... *giggles*

Anyway..... I LOVE THIS STORY!!! I LOVE YOONGIE!!! I LOVE SICA!!! I LOVE SOSHI!!! I LOVE MYSELF!!! Oh. That's.... *awkward smile* *runs away* weeee!!! Great update~~~ ❤️❤️❤️ I feel like an overly enthusiastic kid. I'm totally the opposite in real life. Hahaha *finally decides to sleep* >.>

Edited at 2016-01-09 06:20 pm (UTC)
checkinyourbra: taeyeon05checkinyourbra on January 13th, 2016 09:42 am (UTC)
Re: Wazzup

”Seriously, Sica's trust issues is rubbing off me. XD”—Oh nossss. D: Soon, you won’t even believe that it’s me answering you in the comments. I SWEAR IT’S ME. //shows photo ID with face conveniently rubbed out

You find it cute because it isssss cute. Haeun/Yoona playful moments. :333 Aaaand I see you couldn’t breathe from the onslaught of ADORABLENESS. Muahahahaa

hahahah yes. Ctrl+Ex has been mentioned a few times. hahaha. Maybe Taeyeon’s new haircut affected your vision~~


I want to see this cartwheel and I’d love to make you cringe even more. ;DD


”*finally faints* *struggles to stand up* Y-yes..... I-I'm..... s-still........ a-alive..... Hahahaha I was actually shocked when I saw Jessica's colorful gay hair for the first time.”—HNNNG RIGHT!??!?! I MAY AWARD A RAINBOW PILLOW SOLELY FOR JESSICA-RELATED FAINTS. OMG. Cuuuutie YoonTae. I could depend on you to see Taeyeonie, bb. ;DDD

Questions answered!??! //hugs and twirls around

”I'm not bothered anymore as to why Yoong was shot. It's just sad that it was an accident. D:”—That’s a cool way to think about it. :00 AND DISTURB PEOPLE UP WITH YOUR GASPS. WHATEVER. hahahahha

HAHAHA I’M SO GLAD YOU LOVE YOURSELF. LOVE YOURSELF ALL THE TIME….okay. That’s sounding a little masturbatory. My b.

Now, I’m curious about your non-enthusiastic ~real self. bwahahaha

THANK YOUUUUU FOR READING. And get some sleep!!!
Re: Wazzup - astro24 on January 14th, 2016 05:25 am (UTC) (Expand)
Re: Wazzup - checkinyourbra on January 16th, 2016 10:13 am (UTC) (Expand)
Re: Wazzup - astro24 on January 16th, 2016 10:38 am (UTC) (Expand)
(Anonymous) on January 9th, 2016 05:47 pm (UTC)
my heaaaaart my heaaaart
hey kwon. ;)

is it safe to assume that in this timeline, the yoona with chanhwi does not exist anymore? i mean of course it still does in present yoona's memories but things are /different/ now. chanhwi is with another lady. killed himself too apparently in this lifetime. so... yeah? former yoona with jessica is no more and now we only have /now/ yoona. did what i write make sense lol.

but okay. other serious matters to address.

called it! hyelim won't easily say goodbye that fast, she'll call the wife first and make her hopefully final straining mark on yoonsic's relationship.

(also at first i thought you made up the name hyelim but then i looked it up and wonder girls! so since her introduction that's my visual of her).

losing your parents is awful but then losing them in both timelines, albeit in different ways, is painful hell. i want to hug yoona so bad. and when her and jessica started getting it on i was starting to get relieved again but then bam! not yet!!!! i screeched and thankfully no one around me woke up.

i know jess is still a bit reluctant cos there still are issues to resolve and tho i was losing my cool for a sec there because aaaalmost almost is never enough, i do understand.

thank yoong's 20-20 vision due to post vajaylicking that she found the ring! tell me it has magical powers to salvage the love. :)))) my thirsty mind could just imagine jessica taking the sight of yoona wearing it then rushing to her ripping out everything else yoong is wearing. #hungry

waiting for next chap is torturous but i'm liking your taste in music. ;)
checkinyourbra: yoonsic01checkinyourbra on January 13th, 2016 09:56 am (UTC)
Re: my heaaaaart my heaaaart
I’m going to find my heeeeeeaaarrrrtt, my heaaaaaaarrrrtttt~~~

That paragraph makes sense to me. :333 I like how you put this:
”is it safe to assume that in this timeline, the yoona with chanhwi does not exist anymore? i mean of course it still does in present yoona's memories but things are /different/ now.”

Very nice take there.

Hahahhaaha yeah, I noticed noone mentioned knowing the reference to Hyelim like ever. Guess I don’t cross paths with too many WG fans on here. Unless y’all just didn’t bring it up. hehehe

”losing your parents is awful but then losing them in both timelines, albeit in different ways, is painful hell.”—Word. ;___;


There are still issues, but things are looking up. THAT’S ALL I’LL SAY.

”thank yoong's 20-20 vision due to post vajaylicking that she found the ring”—I’M CREY. HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA. KWON ANON BB. In the true spirit of my Ask page.

Afljasdfsldjdlfdf next chapter shouldn’t be as painful this one. Winding down but….//nervous

Ayyyyyy you like that song, too?? Yessssssss. ;) Thank youuuu for reading, bbbbbb~
anjikainanjikain on January 10th, 2016 12:23 am (UTC)
I feel like I have so much that I want to say but I don't even know where to begin! Honestly this comment will probably just be me saying how much I loved everything

Ah, we finally know how/why Yoona died. Ugh, her relationship with Chanhwi makes me feel so... IDEK what word I'm looking for... creepy, gross, itchy? He doesn't seem like the world's biggest sleeveball and he really loves Yoona but I don't care about his feelings I only care about Yoona! haha

Haeun and Yoona's relationship is so cute. Is it bad that sometimes I think Yoona should just grab Haeun, get in the car, drive away, and never see Jessica and Joonie again? lol They're great and all but Yoona and Haeun together makes me so happy.

Yay Fany to the rescue! And awww she misses her kids. </3 I love Yoona and Tiffany's heart-to-hearts. Fany's always got the best advise. Also I agree with her, if I was Yoona I would have gotten a divorce a long time ago. BUT I swear I love Sica's character too. Honestly, if I were her I also would have divorced Yoona by now. I don't mess around with cheaters, nah fam. Yoooooo Jessica is always thinking ahead! She's too smart for Yoona. She's too smart for me. She's too smart for everyone! But I love seeing a character's flaws though and Sica's got a few; she is as hot and cold as they come. Yoonsic was so close to sexytimes, then NADA. She's probably working on some genius, master plan that I just can't see yet. You do you, Jessica! Haeun's nerdiness saved the day wooooot! I'm very excited for the next update to see what happens next (:

Edited at 2016-01-10 12:24 am (UTC)
checkinyourbra: seohyun04checkinyourbra on January 13th, 2016 10:06 am (UTC)

Booo I haven’t gotten to chapter two of your OT9 fic yet. ;(( You’ll know what I read it, though. Because I gotta comment. ;DDD

Omg. I pick itchy!! For real, though. That…squicky feeling is something else.

”I don't care about his feelings I only care about Yoona! haha”—bahaha YESSSS EFF HIM. #allaboutthatyoongie

:OOOOO Yoona taking off with Haeun would be….oh gawd. //heart breaks ajslfjfdsfsddf ;___;They are super cute, tho. hehehe

Fany’s the only one on earth who could miss her boys so much. <333 Poor bb.


”Yoooooo Jessica is always thinking ahead! She's too smart for Yoona. She's too smart for me. She's too smart for everyone!”—Pffffftttt I giggled at this. You’re too funny. xDDD But I could already tell from your fic. <333

Ahhhhh I hope to satisfy in this upcoming chapter. >.< Thank youuuuuuuuu for dropping by, bb. :DD

Edited at 2016-01-13 10:07 am (UTC)
(Anonymous) on January 10th, 2016 02:05 am (UTC)
the tragedy unveils
LA's stalker here. I want to strangle Chanhwi so bad. No, abortion is not against nature it is a woman's right. And it is anything but love when you force someone against their will. Yoona's previous life is so tragic even though the logical part of me knows that this is the consequence of her choices. Still, the society as a whole owes fair choices to her, and many other LGBT people.

I wonder what triggers the chance for persons to enter the void? Did alter Yoona commit suicide or had a death wish simultaneously as Yoona was being shot to death in her previous life?

And oh the ring! I've forgotten about it already lol. I feel like being Yoonsic's marriage counselor, wanting to point out what they need to work together in order for it to work lol. Like they need to be more financially balanced (not income wise, but actual contributing to the family wise) and Jessica needs to let Yoona take part in all the decision making process. If it involves the kids, ask about the kids opinions too.

The fan girl within me supports Yoona in that rock band 100%!! She would look so handsome playing the drums!! (drooling)

Thanks for the update. Part of me don't want this story to end so I hope they run into endless conflicts in this awesome story :D
checkinyourbra: yoona02checkinyourbra on January 13th, 2016 10:16 am (UTC)
Re: the tragedy unveils
My stalker <3333 //poses sexily in open window

”No, abortion is not against nature it is a woman's right.”—HOH SNAP. TELLUM, STALKER BB. Good points made, though. Despite the choices Yoona’s made on her own, society doesn’t exactly create an easy gateway for her to be open and happy.

The Void’s a curious thing, isn’t it? I hope I do it justice.

Hahahahha you forgot about the ring. Thank goodness Yoona remembered. xDD

Afjklsffdjfdlsfd you’re saying so many good things I wanna pinch your cheeks and throw spoilers everywhere. Just…know…that I love what you’re saying here. >.<


Oh, it’s gotta end. Wish I could whip out more drama for y’all, but idk if I’ll live through it. hahahhaahaha

I’m happy you anticipate GG so much. >.< Thank youuuuuuu <3333
(Anonymous) on January 10th, 2016 10:37 pm (UTC)
YAAAS (06)!!
Bra, this update really made me feel ALL the feels. Thank you for that.

The Kiddos
All the interactions with Haeun and Mama Hwang missing her Terrors were precious. That Man really isn't all bad, even Mama Hwang admits it. Quick q that popped into my head this chapter: what does Mama Hwang do work wise? Does she have remote work like Yoong, office work like Sica (with flex sched), or did she get some really good stuff and generous child/family support in the divorce?

Also, that talk Yoong had with Tiff about how Alter-Yoong really hurt Little Joonie broke my heart. Holy frijole, self-cutting your kid's hair bc it's "not right" is just... not right. I know Alter-Yoong was hurting, but man, that ish really affects kiddos. I'm surprised Sica didn't go "Mama Bear" on her sooner. It was also just like "ding, wow" when Sica revealed the true reason why Joonie's practices are so important to her and him.

That bathroom scene was heart-mending and seckseyyyyyy... and then broke my heart all over again :'(. It's good to see them slowly begin to open up to each other again and work to confront their problems They've got a long way to go, but Yoong found Alter-Yoong's ring and is determined to fix Alter-Yoong's mess ups (and Sica knows it now, too), so they're gonna be alright...
BTW, I love how Yoong found the ring clue from Haeun's painting. Much feels. :')

Hyelim isn't done
Dammmmmn. I would be freaking pissed if an ex, especially a secret ex-mistress, messed with my family to get to me. That's like WAYYYYYYYYYYY over the shady line even for a shady affair.
For some reason, I have a really bad feeling that Hye isn't letting Yoong go and things are going to get crazier with her... like life-threatening/ending crazy (eg: something similar to hysterical Chanwhi and the fatal gun incident) that might lead to Yoong getting sucked back into the void... but if that did happen, I hope that she has earned a "continue" or that "retry" means "comeback to life in current reality" or something that would allow her to come back to life in this reality that she's trying to fix.

Omgoodness, the more we learn about her past, the more sad it becomes. It's interesting to see the similarities and differences between the realities and how Yoong is willing to now face the "harder things" in this life bc she really cares for her new family and friends. Also, just want to say the Chanster seemed extra creepster and abusive in this chapter. Poor Yoong.

Thank you for the update. I can't wait for the next one!

checkinyourbra: tiffany03checkinyourbra on January 13th, 2016 10:38 am (UTC)
Re: YAAAS (06)!!

You’re welcome for that. :333

The Kiddos:
Precious Moments everywhere. //cues those teardrop-eyed figurines

I agree—That Man isn’t the worst. He and Fany broke off for their own reasons and if it’s from TIFFANY HWANG, you know things weren’t splendid.

Tiffany’s profession!!!! So far, she’s hung out on weekend/after work hours and took off work once (having to feign bird flu)—meaning, her schedule isn’t the most flexible. I imagine an office job with a long name that noone would expect from her plus generous child support from That Man. AND A PRENUP. Are prenups a big thing in Korea? No matter—Tiffany made sure to get one. bahahaaha

Heart-mending and secksy. Tis what I was going for. ;D

They’ve a way to go, but I’m gonna wrap this up so y’all can only see the important bit. Time to do some healing.

”so they're gonna be alright...
—//points to the sky// LOOK!!! A BALD EAGLE.

What? That’s a plane?? *runs*

Hyelim isn’t done:
Waaaaaayyyy over the line. Don’t sweat that gurl. She’s small potatoes. >:((((

Or, she could just shoot Yoona. D:

”Yoong is willing to now face the "harder things" in this life bc she really cares for her new family and friends.”—Summed up nicely. No more Chanster…I think. >.>

Let’s huddle hug around Yoongie in the meantime. ;((

THANK YOUUUUU, BB. Until next update. :DDD
yuukistar22yuukistar22 on January 11th, 2016 12:48 am (UTC)
checkinyourbra: Seotae01checkinyourbra on January 13th, 2016 08:37 am (UTC)
(no subject) - yuukistar22 on August 25th, 2016 01:40 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - checkinyourbra on April 15th, 2017 02:36 am (UTC) (Expand)
(Anonymous) on January 11th, 2016 06:18 pm (UTC)
The ring makes its appearance finally, Gollum would be pleased. The book better be Harry Potter if it was that significant to be included in Haeun's drawing and used as a temporary safe.

Each time what looks to be like sexytime happens in the story, Careless Whisper will be playing in the background but it quickly transitions to ' I tried so hard and got so faaaaar, in the end, it doesn't even matter~~' It's sad how much the intimacy between Yoonsic had deteriorated to the point that Jessica is able to use it as a 'weapon' to emotionally manipulate and guilt-trip Yoona. She lacks certainty/control over her marriage so she micro-manages the kids' lives as compensation for herself.

HamsterHyelim better stay away if she doesn't want a fictional cat to chomp on that ball of fluff. For some reason, the MV for f(x)'s 4 walls came to mind after reading this chapter. The butterfly effect and actions triggering chains of events with similar results but in different spaces. All very interesting:)

YoonJoon needs quality time together without Haeun to alleviate the lingering aftermath of AlterYoong's idiocy. Maybe plucking their identical eyebrows or playing Fifa 16... are there even game consoles in the house?

Thank you for the great chapter and you're awesome^^

*waves badminton racket* No doughnuts for you cause THEY'RE ALL MINE hehehehe:D

Shy Anon
checkinyourbra: yoonsic02checkinyourbra on January 13th, 2016 10:45 am (UTC)

Ayyyyy I can make the book Harry Potter—only for you~~

HAHHAHAHAHAHA I DROP THE LINKIN PARK ON Y’ALL EVERY TIME?!?! WELP. Jessica certainly steers the sexuality in this relationship. That’s gotta change.

” She lacks certainty/control over her marriage so she micro-manages the kids' lives as compensation for herself.”— *golf claps* Always.

”HamsterHyelim better stay away if she doesn't want a fictional cat to chomp on that ball of fluff.”-I AM SCREAMINGGGGGGGG. THAT’S A CUT SCENE. JESSICA SICS A CAT ON LITTLE GIUSEPPE.

Oooooh 4 Walls!??!! unnnnnffff one of my all-time faves. And I can see the comparison. I’m honored. >.<

”are there even game consoles in the house?”—YOU NOTICED. I actually allude to this in the next chapter. I’ll give it a resounding NOPE. They go next door and play at the Hwangs for that kinda stuff. And A++++ at considering quality time with widdle Minjoon. ((lollll leave that bb’s eyebrows aloneeee))

THANK YOUUUUUUU *waves bloody dagger*

D:……..fine. I’ll just sit here. Doughnut-less.