checkinyourbra (checkinyourbra) wrote,

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Who Gets the Girl? [on-going]

Title: Who Gets the Girl? [Chapter 26]

Players: Taeyeon, Jessica, Seohyun, Featuring Tiffany

Pairing(s): Taengsic, Seosica, Taeny

Rating: PG-13 + some language

Genre: AU, Rom-Com Drama-Llama.

Warning(s): I pulverize ships, apparently. This chapter ends kinda gross.

Disclaimer: I don't own Soshi. I don't own anyone, in fact. All Fiction.

Chap. Summary: Drunk and unhappy, Jessica starts to wonder about her closer, more accessible options.

Author's Notes: WOW! A big reaction from Yuri’s chapter. Each characters’ final chapters after this. Come out of your lurking and say a lil somethin’! Don’t wanna miss out on the fun before THE END. XD...*creys*


A couple years back...


Jessica stormed into Taeyeon’s studio apartment--her temporary home--and flung her purse onto a desk, noisily knocking over half its contents. Taeyeon sat unfazed on the sofa, eyes glued to the tv screen as she skillfully mashed at the Playstation controller.

“I hate my job.” Jessica whined, peeling off her jacket.

“A job? What’s that?” Taeyeon droned, only her wrists sporadically moving back and forth. She’s such a zombie playing games.

“I shouldn’t care, but some asshole said something today that I can’t shake.”

“Nice tits?”

“Taeyeon, are those the only things on your mind--girls and games?”

A cheeky grin. “There are other things?”

Jessica unzipped her skirt and routinely left it on the floor as she walked over to the couch. “Well, we adults have to think about more than that.”

“Food. I think about food, too.”

“Constantly.” She snatched a blanket draping from a table and neatly laid it on the couch before taking a seat. Who knows what disgusting things have happened on it.

Taeyeon continued to play silently. Jessica zoned out, staring at the pseudo-old school characters shifting about the screen. “Are you still working at that clothing store?”

“Part-time. Emphasis on the part.”

“Taeyeon, can you pay for rent?”

“Yep. With you here, I’m able to work the minimum and get just enough money for rent and food.”

“God, you’re sad.”

“Bite me.”

Jessica rolled her eyes to a close. Her head already ached from an endless day of documents and presentations and proposals. She didn’t need little flying graphics to make it worse. She almost nodded off when Taeyeon spoke.

“What’d the guy say?”

“Well,” she mumbled, eyes not opening, “his mock-up sucked, so I explained to him why. Of course, he called me a bitch.”

“Of course.”

“And then he told me...” She pinched her nose, momentarily re-living the moment. “that I’m so bitter and miserable that I’m destined to die alone.”

Taeyeon pulled long green bangs behind an ear and made eye contact for the first time that evening. “Damn.”

“Yeah. I shouldn’t care. He’s a total tool and emotions were running high during the meeting, blah blah blah. Deadlines. All that nonsense...”

“That’s no excuse to be such a jerk. Did you punch him in the balls?”

“I don’t want my hands near his balls, thank you very much.”

“Or any balls.”


Taeyeon lowered the controller into her lap. “You know what’s gross about balls?”

“Oh god, you’re not going to do this.”

“They’re like...two uneven clumps of flesh wrapped up in saggy--”


Saggy loose skin. That droop underneath him. At all times.”

“You’re disgusting.”

“No, that asshole’s balls are disgusting. And his asshole. That asshole’s asshole is the most disgusting thing on the planet.”

A groan preceded a very lazy whack to Taeyeon’s arm.

“Next time you see him--remember that he has drooping, saggy balls in his pants. This is how you win the battle.”

Jessica finally laughed, as much as hated encouraging her immaturity. That’s the magic of having this strange little person around. She keeps me entertained.

“Just so you know,” Taeyeon said after a hearty chuckle, “living with you isn’t so bad. Surely, someone out there can stand you for the rest of their lives.”

Her smile faded a bit, reflecting on her newly-ended relationship from a few days prior.

“No! Don’t think about her. She's a snob anyways.”

Jessica flung her head over, dropping it onto Taeyeon’s shoulder. “Ye-Jin’s a neurosurgeon! Gahhh, why did she break up with meeee?!”

“Because she’s a stupid brain doctor.”

“You’re a stupid artist.”

“But, I’m still here.”

She smiled. “You’re right.”

“I’m also hungry.” The shorter girl sprung from the couch, leaving Jessica to land onto the cushion. Direct skin contact with this damned couch will probably give me face chlamydia. I’m too exhausted to move.

Her eyes shut on their own accord, ears picking up the oh-too-familiar beep beep beep of her roommate “making dinner.” I’m 99% sure her death will be sodium-related.

“Move your ass!” Taeyeon barked, hurriedly placing the hot bowl onto her desk/dining table.

“Don’t make me,” Jessica mumbled.

“Get up or I’ll describe what my last girlfriend did on that couch in excruciating detail. In fact, I recall a particularly memorable moment where you’re laying your face..”

Jessica sat up. “Stop it. Ugh, you’re so sick!”

Taeyeon unfolded two chairs and took a seat. “Get over here, lady.”

Reluctantly, she dragged her feet across the floor, sloppily tumbling into the plastic chair. “What?”

“Are you familiar with the the term ‘marriage of convenience’?”

“Like your cousin marrying that American dude for a green card?”

“Goddamn. I forgot all about that. She has like eight kids now. So yeah, kind of like that.”

“Do you need a green card, Taeyeon?”

“Nope.” Taeyeon twirled her chopsticks into the steaming noodles. “I’d like to make a pact with you. This is our little ceremony.”


“Our marriage.”

Jessica’s eyes sparked open. “Our what?

“Jessica, don’t tell Sunny, but you’re my best friend. And I know that I’m on the bottom of your ‘quality match’ totem pole, but I really care about your happiness. You’re the bratty non-girlfriend I’ve always wanted.”

The other girl drew her fingers to her mouth, watching Taeyeon’s serene expression. Taeyeon didn’t look up. She kept her eyes on the bowl.

“I offer you a deal. Insurance, if you will. It gets cashed in when we turn...thirty? Yeah, thirty’s a good number. If you don’t find the worldly, sophisticated, better-than-everyone woman of your dreams and I fail to snag a super hot chick with shiny hair and hips that won’t quit, then we have each other.”

“So, in other words, we settle.”

“Yes. Fortunately for you, I’m a catch in the sex department.”

“Let’s keep the skeeviness to a minimum.”

“What do you say?” At last, Taeyeon focused her gaze on a very confused Jessica.

So out of the blue. Does that mean that she likes me or...she sort of likes me? Or...god it’s so weird seeing her this way. She’s just there. My comfort. Is that enough to make such a commitment? “I...I do.”

“I do, too. Therefore, I now pronounce us wife-and-wife if nothing better works out in the future.”

A wide smile stretched across Jessica's face. This is the sweetest thing she’s ever done for me. Anyone’s ever done for me.

Taeyeon brought the noodles to her face, blowing the steam away. “Now for the ceremony finale.”

“Instant ramyun?”

“Yep.” She shoved the noodles into her mouth, letting the longer strands dangle from her lips. With her chopsticks, and held them out to Jessica’s lips. “Come and kiss the bride.”

Jessica held back a laugh as she grasped at the ends with her teeth. They chomped closer and closer in unison. When their noses touched, Taeyeon perked out her lips, closing her eyes.

God, I’m about to kiss Kim Taeyeon.

Picture Ye Jin. Or Tiffany. Or Mila Kunis.

She squeezed her eyes shut, allowing their lips to smoosh together. Her mind busied itself as the soft pecks continued. Ugh, she even smells like that couch. Not the worst smell in the world, though. She fluttered her eyes open once Taeyeon pulled away.

“Great! Now you feel better. I’ll be taking this.” Taeyeon gingerly lifted the hot bowl and took it back to the sofa to finish on her own.

Jessica could still remember that salty, slippery kiss.


“Jessica,” Seohyun hummed, lightly massaging her shoulder. “We’re here.”

What could only be a four minute ride felt like an eternity once Jessica woke up from her short nap. “How long have I been sleeping?”

“You passed out the second I buckled you in. I let you sleep fifteen more minutes once we got here."


"Sorry I took so long pick you up. My parents have been reprimanding me all day.”

Jessica blinked at the the surrounding parked cars in the darkness of the night.

“Taeyeon’s wandering around the lot like a creeper. Do you need help guiding her back to your apartment?”

Dead fingers wrestled with the seatbelt buckle until Seohyun released it for her. “No...I...I got it. You came by the bar just to pick me up?”

“Yes. Convinced Mother that Jiyeon was having emergency boyfriend troubles.”

Jessica shook her heavy head and fumbled for her purse. “S-sawry I didn’t answer your texts.”

“I don’t mind.”

That Seohyun. Picks me up from a random bar just to take me home a few streets over. Going out of her way just to help me. And Taeyeon, too. I guess. “You’re sweet.”

Out of appreciation or neediness--it wasn’t clear--she leaned over to plant a lingering kiss to her lips. Seohyun smiled against her face, returning the favor. The skin of her cheek felt downy soft and her breath had a hint of mint. Jessica contemplated going further, but reminded her foggy mind that another night with Seohyun was NOT okay. She bid her farewell and wobbled out of the car.

The grassy scent of freshly fallen rain eased her senses and she sighed in relief when she spotted a little ball of drunkenness sitting on the sidewalk. She waited for a passing family to enter the building before joining her.

“You could never hold your alcohol well,” Jessica teased, proud that her words were no longer as slurred as before. Still, her head was swimming.

“I’m sho sad, Jeshka. I think I’m gonna die,” Taeyeon murmured, face buried beneath folded arms upon her knees.

“Stop being such a damn drama queen.”

“It’s trueeee,” she whined. “I’ve n-never been broken up wif beforrrre.”

This bitch. “Well, you get used to it.”

Taeyeon raised her pink face, bloodshot eyes blinking rapidly. “I dun wannaaa get used to it. She was so....miiiine.”

“C’mon, Taeyeon. You probably would have broken her heart eventually. ‘Cuz that’s what you do. You break hearts. She just--she just beat you to it.”

Tears filled her eyes. “Jeshka. You awready hurt mah face. Why are you hurting mah heart?”

A sharp pain went through her chest. Suddenly, she felt like the punched one. “I....I don’t knoooow. I’m j-juhhh...”

“Jelly?” Taeyeon cleaned her leaking face with the back of her hand and wiped it onto her shirt. Jessica cringed. Even when she’s utterly disgusting, I find it hard to turn away.

Jessica propped her knees up and settled her head to be eye-level with her friend. “Taeyeonnie, do you remember the night you proposed?”

The other girl squeezed her eyes shut, attempting to recall the memory. “Uh, yeah.”

“You never told me why you did that.”

Her eyelids lifted halfway. “Because you were upset.”

“But, why? That’s a commitment for you, too. It had to have meant something.”

“Say what chu mean. I’m too drunk to think this hard.”

Jessica felt a pressure in the back of her throat. No, I can’t cry. Or we’ll just be two sappy ass drunks making a scene. “We’re alone. Again. Maybe w-we shouldn’t wait until we’re thirty.”


“We should be making out.”

Taeyeon blinked a few times, processing the words. When the message transferred, she dropped a hand flat on the sidewalk to steer her lips to Jessica’s. She stopped short--dazed, blown-out pupils questioning what came next.

Jessica closed her eyes and slacked her mouth open.

Okay. Here goes nothing.

An tongue ran across her lip, then slipped into her mouth. It was slimy and flavored with cheap beer, but she tilted her head to accommodate the action. They picked up a steady rhythm, humming and gulping deeply.

Each pass was languid, deep, penetrating. Her lungs clenched for any ounce of oxygen Taeyeon allowed.

Breaking for air, Jessica reached up to cup her face. A pained whimper reminded her of the damage she’d done.

“Gentle. I’m injured,” she breathed against her face.

Ugh, I hate the smell of beer breath. “Then, watch your tongue. You kiss like a cow.”

“I kish like your mother?”

Jessica palmed at her waist, bringing their lips back together. I need to shut her up. Yet, she found herself speaking once she got a good grip. “Oh, gawwwd. Can you do some crunches or whatever? You’re sooo squishy.”

“Tiffany likes it.”

“Don’t talk about other girls while we’re making out.”


The kisses didn’t lighten up. With that ale-flavored tongue wedged so far into her mouth, the only method of air consumption came in sharp gasps. Taking the irregular sounds as moaning, Taeyeon did some absurd puppy-like mewl with excitement.

Mmmm. Jeshka. Let’s connuhhh--consuhmah....”

Oh, god.

“Cahhhnsummuuuh....consummate this marriage.”

Small hands clutched at Jessica’s hair in an unpleasant tug. She slapped them away. A determined hand returned at the apex of her cleavage. Mixing the harsh liplock and uncouth groping to her chest brought the feeling in her throat again. She tried to ignore it.

I can’t start wailing about Yoona right now. Not in the middle of--

It wasn’t a sob she was holding back.

In a split second, she found herself hunched between their legs, vomiting up all the drinks. Tears ran freely down her cheeks, mingling into smudged mascara as she hurled harder, wishing she would've had at least one croissant as solid food.

“Shhhhhitttt.” Taeyeon huffed, failing to properly hold her hair back. Again, Jessica spanked the touchy fingers.

“Dun touch me. No more. No moooore.”

“Ahh, ffffffooookin’ rude. The kiss wasn’t that bad.”

The realization that she’d drunkenly made out with Kim Taeyeon had her dry heaving. What’s going on with me? Why am I trying to kiss anyone within a one foot radius of my face? “I want to annul our stupid marriage.”

“Are there noodles in your vom? That’d make it wayyy more official.”

Jessica didn’t bother to aim as she punched Taeyeon with all her might. She had no idea what she hit, but an agonizing groan confirmed its impact.

“You’re sho abusiveee!” Taeyeon cried. Jessica glanced at her holding her neck.

“W-wait until I’m sober.” She hurriedly dug into her purse for a napkin--hanky, tissue--anything to rid her face of the mess.


It took Jessica a few seconds to register that Taeyeon was on her cell phone.

“Tiffany! Hiiii! I’m.....yeahhhh. I’m drunk. Like, really drunk.”

“Wuh-what do you expect? You broke up with me and smashed my heart into a millionnn itty bitty--”


A long pause.

“But that text--”

“I....I.....Okay. I’ll stay at Jeshka’s tonight. Tell Sunny I said hey.”

Jessica ran a crumpled receipt across her chin. “Tell that bish I want mah car back.”

She ended the call without relaying her message. “D-doesn’t ‘I need my space’ mean she broke up wif me?”

“No, dumbass. It means she wants her space.” If you endured my plethora of break-ups, you’d have this common sense.

“I.....” Taeyeon lurched to the grass behind them, taking her turn to throw up.

“I cheated on Tiffany. Holy haaaleeee. I...I....” She continued to hurl.

The splashing, gurgling racket had Jessica nauseous all over again. She snatched Taeyeon’s phone and messily dialed Seohyun.

“Pleeeease come back, Seohyun. I need you.”

Next Chapter:  Seohyun!

Tags: au, fic, jessica, pg-13, snsd, whogetsthegirl
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